Rough Day.

I woke up with a lump in my throat this morning. I knew I wasn't physically sick. I just felt emotionally sick for some reason. As I went about the routine of the day... soccer, church stuff, and family time, I tried to put my finger on why I feel the way I do. In my brain, I made a list.

1. Pressure of our official church launch in 21 days!!

2. The anxiety of my car issues this past week.

3. Pressure in finding a few GREAT musicians...fast.

4. The way God is making my heart ache more and more for the lost.

5. The stress of knowing Steve is going to be away from us, and across the country for the next 3 days.

6. My constant awakening to the different spiritual culture here in the south.

I assumed all of those things added up to make the one big knot in my stomach... until I overheard a conversation Cameron was having with my dad this afternoon.

I sat next to Cam while he told his grandpa about soccer and his drawings and lots of other crazy stuff. And then out of no where I heard Cameron say (in a really sad voice), "Grandpa, I sure miss you. I really wish I could go with daddy to see you."

I felt my heart shrink like it does at the end of any sappy love story, and I realized...
Although I'll miss Steve and his help this week, the reason I'm so weepy is because Steve will be face to face with my mom and dad in less than 24 hours...and I wish SOOO bad that I could see them too. I miss my parents every single day I'm here. And I know they miss me too. They pretend to just miss my boys!!! But I know without a doubt they miss me too! And I just want to hug them so bad!
(I'm weeping again...GEEZ!)

Cameron was sad when he got off the phone, and I promised him that we'd have a really fun time together while daddy is away! Just looking at that boy brings me joy! And my Riley boy...he loves me in such a special way. I attribute that to the sweet times I had with him in the ICU while he recovered from his surgery not so long ago!

We're going to make the next few days GREAT ones!

Anyway...I'm hoping that by writing this all out, it might relieve some of the heartache I feel tonight. Probably not. But oh well! Mom and dad, if you're reading this come back soon. Cameron and Riley miss you... and so do I!