Remembering to Reminisce

Steve and I spent the past 2 days in Palm Springs with some close friends for a little R&R. I found out that I have a hard time finding a balance between trying to maximize my rest while, at the same time, making the most of every minute I have without my demanding children around. Although I don't feel like I rested as much as I would have liked to, I was actually getting anxious to see my boys pretty quickly after we left them.

On our drive home today, I had a very discontent, uncomfortable feeling. I really couldn't figure out exactly what it was. I tried for the entire 2 hour drive to find reasons for my pensive, melancholy mood, but there was nothing I could excuse it for.

After we picked up Cameron, and then came home to Riley, we were all sitting together talking about our days away from each other, and then...it hit me. I suddenly knew why I felt the way I did on my way home.

I realized that while I was away for two entire days, I looked at my husband through different eyes. I just felt so incredibly thankful for him while we were in the desert. I felt like I was able to see him more as who he is as my "husband", instead of the role of "daddy" he plays to our boys. I have such high expectations of the father of my sons, and not only does he exceed them all, but he's still the AMAZING man, my heart throbbed for almost 7 years ago when we started dating. I know...gross, and incredibly mushy. But it's sooo true. I vividly remember the season of my life as an 18 year old girl in high school, trying to plan almost every day around when I would get to see him. Every day, I thought about how much I couldn't WAIT to have a family with this man. And NOW...that my "dream" has come true, I miss those days badly. The days where really nothing mattered as long as we were with each other.

I truly think this revelation today is a reminder from God that He gave me the man of my dreams. The one I prayed for. I used to replay slow-mo's in my mind of our special dates and times together before we were married. And although life is busy, and hard, and crazy now... I am sooo thankful that Steve is mine forever.

Want more mush? This post inspired me to read through the boxes of letters that I wrote Steve when we first started dating. He saved them all! I don't know how I graduated high school or kept a job while managing my relationship with Steve. Check this out.

Here's one stack of MANY letters:





Here's a decent one I could share:

(Click the picture to make it bigger)

Life Change Flip Cards

Last night was our first "Big Event" service at Journey. In my opinion, this service could be considered one of the highest impact services Journey has ever seen. From the intense music and song selection to each video element and every word spoken by a pastor, God is definitely MOVING people this weekend, and changing lives as we've diligently been praying for.

One service element that we're doing for the first time is something called "Life Change Flip Cards." We've asked about 70 people to write 3-4 words on the front side of a piece of poster board, describing their lives before encountering Christ, and on the back, 3-4 words describing their lives after being REDEEMED by Christ! During the service, these people would line up behind the stage, during a song (The Time Has Come by Hillsong United), and they would come out to the center of the stage one at a time, holding up their card to show the BEFORE, and then flipping it over to show the AFTER. They'd all remain on stage and at the end of the song, when everyone was out, they'd all hold up their cards reflecting how God had changed their lives.

During the week, we had a practice where the participants were able to write on their poster board things like "Depressed, and Bound" and on the other side "Joyous, and FREE!" The group that came was, for the most part, pretty eclectic. Young and old, crazy and not so crazy, humble, embarrassed, and some pretty confident and comfortable.

But as they each wrote on these cards how God changed their lives, it was amazing to see the common thread that really created an unorganized, unplanned sense of complete community and even friendship between these folks. EACH person involved had an undeniable encounter with God, and He changed them. And they are completely aware that their life change was a direct result of God's hand of mercy and just a total MIRACLE.

The congregation responded well to this service element, and I'm personally really glad we did it, because it was a huge reminder to me. I'm living life the way I am right now because God changed my heart, and has revealed to me why I exist. I couldn't tell you my exact purpose of existence. Not because I don't know, but because there are too many to try to narrow it down. My "Life Change Flip Card" would look something like this:




















I've regretted quite a few decisions I've made over the 25 years of my life, but I can honestly say I've never once regretted the decision I've made to follow Christ. I think that's only because it really wasn't ever MY decision to be changed. It was God's. And I am soooo thankful He desired my heart enough to call me into His Kingdom.

Idol Takes The Cake

My friend, Rod, and I were recently talking about TV ratings. I did some research and found this interesting. Here are the top rated TV shows of last week followed by their network and # of viewers.

1. American Idol (Tues) Fox 31.2
2. American Idol (Wed) Fox 28.9
3. House Fox 26.0
4. Grey's Anatomy ABC 25.8
5. CSI CBS 22.7
6. CSI: Miami CBS 19.9
7. Desperate Housewives ABC 18.5
8. Survivor: Fiji CBS 16.1
9. Deal or No Deal NBC 16.1
10. Two and a Half Men CBS 15.5
11. NCIS CBS 15.4
12. Criminal Minds CBS 15.2
13. Shark CBS 15.1
14. CSI: NY CBS 14.8
15. Heroes NBC 14.7
16. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition ABC 14.2
17. 24 Fox 13.7
18. Ugly Betty ABC 13.7
19. Rules of Engagement CBS 13.4
20. 24 Fox 13.1
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28. The Office NBC 5.1

What's For DInner?

In attempts so save money and eat a little healthier, I've come up with a blog dedicated to weekly dinner menus. Check it out! HERE!

I Think I Can, I Think I Can, I Think I Can!

Well, in about three weeks, you can consider me a "stay at home, mom". Who ever thought I'd ever be a mother of two boys, let alone, make it my occupation?! Insane?... for sure.

Steve recently doubled up on jobs so that I'd have this opportunity. After about a week of testing the waters in this new experience, I'll have to be honest and tell you... I have a LOT of learning to do between now and June. And I definitely WON'T be a "stay at home" mom. I will be a "Never stay at home with 2 boys under the age of 3, mom" We will be making lot's of trips to the park, friends pools, and of course "Java Mama".

My good friend, T, has been posting weekly or monthly things around the house she wants to accomplish. She posts before and after pictures and checks them off when she's completed. I will use this technique for the things I need my children to accomplish while I'm home with them. The TOP "To Do's" involve Cameron.

Number 1: POTTY TRAIN BEFORE AGE THREE
Number 2: Figure out how to make him UNLEARN the words "shut up"

Although I don't have a whole lot of patience to hand out, I will give Riley a little more grace. I won't make his list for a few months.

We went to the mall today, and I got a little taste of the positive side of spending almost every waking moment with my children. I realized that there are certain smiles and expressions in Cameron that I've never seen before. I taught Riley how to say dadda in less than day, and also how to clap his hands when I ask him to. Every time I teach him something new, he learns it almost immediately...SOOOO COOL.

So...long story short, I know that this decision will pay off in the long run, but in the mean time... does anyone have any tips on how to carry a double stroller, a car seat, an infant, a diaper bag, purse and a two year old down 19 stairs? I think I almost died 2 times today.

Here I go!!

THE TIME OF MY LIFE.

Question:
What could be better than watching the best movie ever made on a big screen at the movie theater?

Answer:
Watching it on a big screen in a theater PACKED FULL of people who love the movie almost as intensely as you do.

Happy 20 Year Anniversary, Dirty Dancing. I love you.
Never Forget.

FYI

Riley's Journey has been updated.