The Other Cause

Life and Times...

2011-01-23T23:39:00.008-05:00

After 7 years of marriage (so far) and two kiddos (far enough), I can honestly say that there's not one 'season' of life that I have favored over another. Every 'season', every month, every week, and every DAY is INSANE from the view of this Faiai momma! I do take in to consideration the fact that I'm kinda high strung, and overly anxious to begin with, but whatev. Working on it. Instead of boring anyone with details of the past 6months (or however long its been since my last post),I thought it would be a good idea, even just for me, just to assess and give an update on the things I value most in mi vida loca. Here goes.

1. My Marriage
Rewarding. dynamic. Hard. We're about 5 months in to our '7 year itch'. Is that what 'they' call it?! Heck yes, marriage is hard. But for whatever reason, through everything we've been through, we have a tighter grip on eachother now than ever before. Not just saying that. Steve and I need eachother. We're each other's BIGGEST fans and our kids, just by their nature, hold us accountable DAILY to love and respect eachother as best we can. Our kids love us more than anything else on the planet, and we know that the BEST way we can reciprocate that love to them is by loving eachother!

2. The Kids
Cameron is 6 and Riley James is 4. Completely opposite personalities. The other day, I was listening to my Lauryn Hill Pandora station. The song 'Lost One' came on. It's really about Lauryn tellin her ex homeboy that she's outie. 'You just lost one' . Cameron was listening to the words and asked me what she 'lost'. Instead of explaining the song to him (bc I was busy singing it. Hello?!), I just told him I thought she was probably talking about losing a friend or something. A few more minutes went by, the song was over, and Cameron said to me 'mom, I know about that song'. I asked him what he meant. To which he replied 'Well, I just lost a friend at school today.' I knew he was just tired and being over dramatic, but his heart hurt bad for those few moments thinking about losing a friend. That's Cameron. And Riley...well...let's just say he tells us that he's actually 7 years old and that he's the boss of his brother. He also thinks he's the boss of his mommy and daddy. And well...pretty much the boss of the world. Aggressive, tender hearted, happy, and very determined. That's my Riley. Due for his second cranial-vault repair surgery later this year. Will update on that later!

3. Friendships
Oh man. If you know me, you know I LOVE people, and especially my close friends. I love them almost to a fault. Actually, completely to a fault. But oh well...working on that, too. I have made some INCREDIBLE friends in the past year. I have a passion for digging through life with others who are doing the same! My friends inspire me. They motivate me. And most importantly, they keep me laughing, even in the times when life seems unbearable.

4. Church Ministry
I stilllll believe that the local church IS the hope of the world. We've been exposed to so many different visions, mission statements, denominations, and theology interpretations (if that makes sense) over the past couple years. Thankfully, through it all, God has kept things simple for us. We believe that the more we seek God, the more we'll know Him. And the more we know Him, the more we'll love Him. And the more we love Him, the more we'll love what He loves. Love God, eachother, and the people around us! Everything else seems to follow! The church is full of broken people, like us, who's insecurities have tendency to, well...screw up a lot of stuff that God has intended for good. We've learned about people, and God's grace through every 'church experience' we've been a part of... and we still love serving our local church. Steve still feels a calling on his life to lead people into worship through music. Thankfully, he can serve in that role on the side, voluntarily now, instead of depending on it as a source of income! Hallelujah for that! He LOVES his job at Henry's and I love his job at Henry's. Right now, we're loving watching our long time friend's new church plant grow wings! God is blessing them, and we wanna help out and support it as much we can!

5. Me
I'm learning a LOT about myself in recent months. I really have an uneasy feeling towards 'Christians' who think they've got life figured out. The ones who go around telling others what God doesn't accept about them. On the other hand, I am passionate about digging through life with people who admittedly need God, or who are trying to understand who God is. I have huge respect for people who can own up to their own ugliness, while at the same time understand that God loves them/us (on a crazy different level than we can wrap our brains around) THROUGH IT ALL!!! Jesus died to give us HOPE! And I want nothing more than for my life to bleed that 'hope'! I'm working full time at our friends Submarina franchise. I love that job! So much fun for me, flexible for the most part, a little too far of a drive, but oh well! I'm thankful for the relationships I've built there! One of my new favorite things is playing softball on our new co-ed league. Our team name is Smack That! My teammates consist of a rad group of new friends, and old ones! The dynamic of those relatiosnhips is SO awesome!! I love that team, and playing a sport that I love with them! My relationship with my extended family is in a sweet spot! I love my parents so much, and am so thankful for everything they did to make me passionate about life and people. I have so much junk I need to work on, but I'm truly loving my hectic little life through it all. Every piece of it!

I could probably write 4 more pages about all this stuff right now, but this is about as much patience I have with having to write a post using the keyboard of my iPhone! Mac Book is out of commision and the pc just got a virus. Boooo!
My poor sweet neglected little blog. I sure do miss it!

ADDICTED!!!!

2010-05-25T23:52:00.004-04:00

In recent weeks I've been, for lack of better terms, alarmed at some of my impulsive behavior. Ha! That sounds awesome!! I'm pretty sure there are things all of us are 'addicted' to, whether we admit to it or not, but when I see YUCK in MY life, I get pretty passionate about fixing it or at least, I like to study the patterns!!

Ugh!! WHY??! Why are there so many things I get caught up in?? To try to make life more important? To feel better about myself? To mask insecurity?! Everytime I think about the things I pour way too much of myself into, I can't get a certain thought out of my head!!

'Is God big enough?!' Heck yeah, He is... Would be my gut reaction. But my behavior often demonstrates otherwise! Do I reeeeeallly believe that GOD, my Creator, the same creator of the universe, is big enough to handle ME?!!! All my junk, baggage, hangups etc..? If I did truly believe that, I have a feeling my life would look a little bit different. Or... A LOT different! I'm not talking about being addicted to anything immoral or that would put me in physical danger. I'm talking about the little, itty bitty tiny things that go totally unnoticed until I realize my attitude towards life changing as a direct result. Social networking has definitely become a weakness of mine! I LOVE writing and talking to people and making friends and reconnecting with old ones, but.. holy COW! Where and how do I draw a stinkin LINE?!!! Probably when everyone else's life happenings start effecting my mood for the day?!?! When 'Johnny' updates his status and tells us his dog got hit by a car today, my kids better be on their best behavior, because their mom is probably gonna be an emotional wreck for most of the day! That's LAAAAAAME! A lame example too, but just making my point!! Sooo not fair to anyone around me! YUCK!

I have lots of friends who have taken 'breaks' or whatever from social networking. I don't think I need to get all crazy and do anything like that, but I do need to be more aware of these behaviors, so that I can see them coming BEFORE my life becomes consumed and effected by them!

I KNOW God is big enough to make ANY change He wants to in my life! I want to seek Him, know Him and LOVE Him enough to not want ANYTHING else beside the things He wants for me! Hmmm... I gotta figure that out!

I just reposted a dorky awesome song I wrote about a year ago, called 'twitter fast'. It just about sums up all of this nonsense!!

Ready...GO!

2010-03-21T15:22:00.003-04:00

I LOVE MARCH! Between Steve's bday, March madness basketball (that makes him happy), the warmer temps, fun busy workdays, and just getting ready for summer, this month is awesome! We've been in a very transitional season of life for almost two years now. Feeling pretty aimless at times, but we've been mostly encouraged by the chance we've had to dive in to so much new opportunity.

We know that ultimately God is the one who guides every twist and turn of our lives. We also know that the season of life we're in is a result of a bunch of different choices we've made over the years. Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference between the two. I often ask myself things like "Is THIS circumstance one that God intended or one that is a result of a specific choice I made?" I'm sure people could argue both ways, and I believe that it's probably a combination of both, and could probably be swayed either way in a debate! What I've realized in recent weeks though, is... that debate is completely irrelevant to what God wants us to focus on right now. Every added up circumstance has put us in a new, raw, real and pivotal place. When I used to play softball, out in the field, we were always told to be on our toes in a ready stance to be able to easily move our body either way toward whichever direction the ball was hit. If we were flat on our feet, it was almost impossible to retreive the ball quick enough to make a play. I don't think I need to elaborate any more on the dorky illustration, but it's soooo true for me right now! I feel so ready, on my toes, primed and ready to receive WHATEVER direction God wants us to move in. Without everything that we've been through in the past couple of years, we'd be flat on our feet and going through the motions, and we'd most likely hate the thought of having to change anything. We are soooo excited about every glimpse of opportunity that God has given us! And I truly feel like we're in such a pivotal, ready stance, that we CAN make any move or change quickly and swiftly. I think this realization is, for a fact, God's intention of why we are where we are! I've never been more anxious and ready to see what he has in store. I know there are always going to be things that I'm naturally going to squirm and whine at having to change, but for what it's worth, I'm ready. And I'm thankful, so thankful to be where I am...ready for anything!

Crazy Little Thaang Called 'LOVE'.

2010-02-11T00:41:00.005-05:00

I LOVE people. No question. But I often consider that one of my BIGGEST faults. After reading a lot about love this week, I'm realizing why it's such a flaw of mine. I've got 'LOVE' all twisted. backwards. misinterpreted.

I have no problem investing, trusting, and pouring my heart into the people I care about. But the problem with that has to do with my initial motive which provokes that kind of 'love'. A lot of the time (most of the time) after pouring into someone, I'm left empty, totally insecure and feeling like the love I give isn't being reciprocated.
*LIGHT BULB ON!!*
Talk about 'looking for love in all the wrong places'!! This is where my view of who God is needs to change! Like NOW! If I understood the DEPTH of love the Father has for me, I wouldn't feel the need to squeeze it out of the people around me! And if I grasped that, then the love that I GIVE would be natural, flowing, a fruit of the Spirit, bearing NO hidden agenda or expectations! And I wouldn't feel empty after expending it.

I won't stop loving and investing in people. But I will start implementing more disciplined time acknowledging God's love for me. Seems like the root of every insecurity goes back to just some minor hiccups in my view of who God is. Putting this thinking process into action has already infused so much hope, peace, and freedom in this CRAZAY LOVER WOMANNNN!!!

New perspective!!! Love it when that happens!

Still Keepin' It Real.

2010-02-09T00:07:00.006-05:00

It's been waaaay too long since I've updated 'The Other Cause'. I don't even want to look at the date of my last post, because it depresses me to think how long I've neglected this once vibrant, full of life, blog. There are many technical reasons as to why I've taken such a lonnng break. There are also just as many personal reasons I haven't been here. More of an 'at loss for words' deal than by choice.

If I were to say these past few months have been a roller coaster ride, I'd be lying. Life's been more of a friggin skydive...and scrambling in mid air to remember where the cord is to release the stupid parachute.

I'd like to think I have a pretty positive outlook on life. And in the darkest of nights, I've managed to keep fighting my way through looming depression, guilt, dispair and hopelessness. I wish I could start a new paragraph now and talk about how all of that's changed! Ha! I can't.

So many things still need to fall in to place. I could list them, but I won't in attempts to save this post from becoming the pity party rant...that it's quickly turned into!

"WHERE HAVE YOU FIXED YOUR HOPE?" was a simple, yet heart checking question I was faced with this weekend during a message at Journey. I kinda did a double take when I heard it asked, because for some reason those words shot straight through to my soul. Totally caught off guard and I knew God wanted me to answer that question. Ouch. All I could think about were millions of things I wanted. A car, a job, a house, nice clothes, cable, internet, endless amounts of cash!!! ...And other not so tangible things. Security, peace, comfort, contentment. I've spent countless, sleepless nights staring at the ceiling trying to figure out how to put all the pieces together so that I could obtain all of these 'things', in attempts to finally be happy, safe, secure, and content. For whatever reason, those attempts have been unsuccessful and have put me inside a big tunnel of anxiety. Where have I fixed my hope?!

If I truly believed what I claim to believe about who God is, my concern and values would revolve around the things that please Him and bring Him glory, NOT vice-versa. By placing my hope in the 'stuff' I want for ME, I'm doing nothing more than locking myself up in a dungeon and becoming a slave to societies standards.

God's will for me is SO much bigger than the things I want. I wish I could wrap my brain around the fact that I'll NEVER be able to wrap my brain around how God works, and how giving total control to Him, means FREEDOM for me! This realization takes away fear, and reminds me how truly 'well off' I already am. We're surrounded by a great community of friends and family who love us so much. We have two beautiful boys and the opportunity to shape them into lives that could possibly change the world! We have a great marriage, that has been tested and made its way through fire! And we have our whole lives ahead of us to make an impact in countless other lives...to name a few!

I have such a long way to go, but I'm eager to start intentionally FIXING MY HOPE on Christ. And anticipating ohhh the sweet ways He CHANGES the desires of my heart!

The Vine and a Butt Kicking.

2009-07-26T18:13:00.006-04:00

In an attempt to make sense of a bunch of scattered thoughts and run on sentences, I decided to give my poor, neglected blog a little lovin' today!

This weekend in a message given by Wilson Creek Winery owner, Mick Wilson, our congregation was given literal illustration of what it means to live a life connected to The Vine. In reference to John chapter 15, we were challenged to take a close look at our own lives in search of the evidence, or the fruit, of a life connected to Christ. I metaphorically had the wind knocked out of me when I realized today, in how many ways, Christ has not been the only source that I've been drawing life from.

GUT CHECK #1:
* Where is the fruit?! Lately, so much of my life is spent just coping, and not enough spent on learning what it means to abide in Christ and making sure I'm always bearing fruit!

* If I'm spending time drawing life from other sources, what are they? And why are they so important to me?

Mick snapped off two branches of the vine he brought from Temecula to help illustrate his message. One of the branches was brown, dry and dead. The other was green, lush with beautiful leaves. He explained that although the appearance of the one on his right looked vibrant and full of life, it was in fact, dead because it was snipped from it source. It would eventually wither and become dry and brown like the branch he held in his left hand.

GUT CHECK #2:
* How much of my happiness, and joy is just a facade?! How much time do I have left to turn things around before my soul is withered and dry?!?!

GUT CHECK #3:
The biggest challenge for me this weekend has been to identify the "sucker branches" or false sources that I've been sucking life from.

There are certain people, I believe, God places in my life to strengthen me, give me hope, and just motivate me to love life. Although they are so important to me, they are NOT meant to be my source, and I HAVE ashamedly taken advantage of them by placing them in a role that God was meant for and wants to fill. It seems like somehow I've tricked myself into believing these people in my life are more tangible and accessible than the God who created me. Ouch! When did THAT happen?! Not only do I now need to reconnect to the True Vine, but I also owe a serious apology to my friends, and my husband especially, for expecting them to fill that crazy complex hole in my heart.

After taking a pretty big beating in the form of a reality check today, I am so encouraged to know reconnecting to The Vine is as simple as asking God to connect to me, and to remain in His word, seeking His truth. And even more encouraged to know that God cares enough about me to continue my pruning and essentially refocus my eyes on Him.

Ugh. I don't deserve that. I have so much work to do. God, you're grace and patience is crazy rad.

John 15:1-10
“I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit. You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up; and they gather them, and cast them into the fire and they are burned. If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples. Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love."

Videos of the boys!

2009-04-24T17:53:00.005-04:00

My friends and family who don't have Facebook have been asking to see video of the boys! So I decided to post a couple of my favorites from Cameron here on The Other Cause!! I'll post a few of Riley in the next couple of days!

Enjoy!!

Stick with what you know!

2009-03-03T16:41:00.005-05:00

My hubby is a "stick with what you know" kind of guy! I'm probably a little more adventurous and daring than he is when it comes to things like ordering food... but what I do admire is his ability to not be phased by the flashy, bright colored new menu items, and order the same ol' thing!!

Right now, we're living with Steve's sister and her family until we can get back on our feet here. We are SOOO humbled by their generosity, and thankful to be able to spend so much time with the people who love our family most!

Recently, after the kiddo's go to bed, Steve and I have started having a time where we lock ourselves in the garage for a few hours and just talk, reflect, encourage, and seek God together about what He wants for us! These times have pretty much turned into intimate times of...WORSHIP (what were YOU thinking, sicko?). I decided that I wanted to start taping some of our favorite songs to sing together. There are many!

In this time of our lives when we're figuring out just what God wants to do with us, we've found that one of the things that makes the waiting, questioning, and wondering a little easier is "sticking with what we know"! For now...that's worshiping Him!

This is a song that a friend in North Carolina introduced me to, called "The More I Seek You" by Kari Jobe.

The more I seek you,
the more I find you
The more I find you, the more I love you

I wanna sit at your feet
drink from the cup in your hand.
Lay back against you and breathe, feel your heart beat.
This love is so deep, it's more than I can stand.
I melt in your peace, it's overwhelming

Spiritual Nuggets of Nothingness.

2008-12-30T22:57:00.003-05:00

Been at a loss for words lately, and THAT has actually been a good thing. In the past, I've been pretty good at putting a rhyme or reason to everything God does in my life. And for maybe the first time, in this season, I have nothing. I have no explanation as to why God would call us to leave a good job in San Diego, have us uproot our family to serve at an awesome church plant across the country, only to have us come back to San Diego 9 months later...in a time when finding a job is close to impossible, and when the stakes are so high with 2 growing boys watching and learning from our every move. It just doesn't make much sense to me.

I'm so glad to be home with our family and such awesome friends who love us so much. That alone has pulled us through all the trouble it's been to get settled here again.

I've NEVER been one to ask God "Why?". It just seems like a shallow question to ask an All Knowing God. But a little bit, like even a smidge, of clarity would be nice.

So...I've asked. And, still, nothing.

So, I've kind of just decided to STOP trying to make sense of it all and just do it. Go through it. We're clinging to God's word and the fact that it's true. We're making sure our sweet boys know that we love them more than anything in the whole world. We're hunting for jobs like crazy, and aren't being picky about any line of work. In the midst of cruddy times, we won't compromise our character, core values. We're attending the church we love, as it has a huge piece of our heart. We're not avoiding awkward conversations about "what's going on with the Faiai's". We're not broadcasting our story to the world either. We appreciate the prayers that our friends and family pray on our behalf. We're eagerly looking forward to some crazy breakthroughs in the next few weeks.

So, I'm pretty much at the end of today's post, and haven't made much sense of anything. Maybe that's because I'm not supposed to right now. I remember Ed (our teaching pastor) once say something about "if God isn't giving you words to say on His behalf, then He probably doesn't want you to say anything." So instead of ending this post by sharing one of my GIGANTIC spiritual nuggets of wisdom, I'll instead just keep being at a loss for words for a while longer.

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-09T00:07:00.004-05:00

So much to post! Not nearly enough time to post it! Update coming soon. Until then, Merry Christmas from the Faiai boys! Thanks to all of our friends and family for your continued love, support and friendship!

2008 Election Predictions

2008-11-04T16:10:00.002-05:00

Who will it be?!

A Halloween Reunion!

2008-11-02T14:06:00.006-05:00

The boys and I have been hangin' low at my parents house trying to adjust to the time change, and maintain a somewhat regular routine for the boys. They have never been trick or treating before, so we were excited to be able to roam the neighborhood in search of candy with some close friends and their families! We had a great time, and the sappy cornball that I am couldn't help but get a bit emotional just seeing my kids so happy to be around the people who love them so much!

Here are a few pictures from the evening!

Playing the piano before getting into costume!

My wrestler boy and firefighter!

My babies!!

His best attempt at a mean face!

Lot's of candy for Cameron Lee!

Lot's of candy for Riley James!

Fell asleep on the bed talking to grandma about his day.

Back in Cali.

2008-10-30T05:33:00.004-04:00

With soooo much to do, and too little time to post, here's a few snippets of what we're up to...of course combined with the random musings of my brain!

After a couple months of anticipation, and 1 LONG flight adventure, me and the boys are finally home in San Diego. What a ride. They were GREAT on the plane, thanks to awesome goodies and toys from friends before we left.

Thanks to friends in Raleigh - Our awesome friends, Christian, Kelly and their families, put together an INCREDIBLE surprise going away party for us. When we walked into a house full of all of our favorite people, I was just humbled at the way God blessed us with such great community while we were in Raleigh. So AWESOME!

The boys are doing great. They're missing their daddy, but other than that, they are so so so glad to be in San Diego with grandma and grandpa. Riley is still trying to figure out the time change and what exactly we're doing here. Once Steve gets here, I think things might feel a little more normal for him! We'll see!

I am so glad to be back in SD. I don't feel like I'm the same person as I was 9 months ago. My heart has be tweaked, my desires have changed and while I'm overwhelmed, I'm excited to sort of establish our semi new life here!

We have so much to do, but until Steve gets here next week, we're going to just enjoy spending time with family. We're heading out to our cabins in the desert this weekend!

Thanks to everyone who prayed for our trip. Please keep praying for Steve and Jerry's drive back. They leave Raleigh on Sunday morning and will get here hopefully by Wednesday afternoon!

Boys and Puppies!

2008-10-24T09:26:00.010-04:00

My friend, Christian has two beautiful beagles, Sarge and Mackey. Mackey had 7 puppies about 2 weeks ago! My boys LOVE dogs! Especially little ones! So we took a little trip out to Holly Springs to meet the new puppies!!

I've NEVER seen Riley more animated in his whole life!! He was instantly in love, and couldn't stop looking, holding and loving on each sweet little baby!

Here's a few short video clips of our visit!

Cameron Says...

2008-10-17T08:52:00.002-04:00

I'm very behind on this post series. But Cameron has been "at his best" with the crazy little thoughts that run through his brain, so, to catch us up, here are two conversations I had with Cameron this past week.

Cameron Conversation #1
I was snuggling with Cameron in his room when he said "Mom, I'm going to miss going to your soccer games (he means softball) and playing with the kids there."

Me: "I know, bud. I'm glad you met so many nice people and kids there."

Cameron: "I like playing with Kenzie the best."

Me: "Oh, so is Kenzie your girlfriend?"

Cameron: "EW Mom, no. Not girlfriend. She's just my friend. I don't like girlfriends, mom."

Me: "Oh, you don't?"

Cameron: "No. Well... I mean, I like their dresses and their beautiful hair, but I don't like girlfriends."

Me: "Oh ok. I know what you mean. Goodnight Cameron."

Cameron Conversation #2
Cameron was very angry that Steve and I ate the last 2 banana crumb muffins that I made yesterday (even though he'd just finished eating one).

Cameron: "I CAN'T BELIEVE you guys ate ALL of the muffins, mom and dad. I guess I will NEVER have a muffin again.

Me: "Cameron, chill out."

Steve: "Cameron, Daddy will go get more bananas and mommy will make more."

Me (to Steve): "What are you talking about? I'm not going to make him a brand new batch of muffins just because he's throwing a fit!"

Cameron runs off angrily into our bedroom. After about 5 seconds, he comes back out to yell "MOM! Your muffins are NOT the best muffins in the world."

Me: "Oh good. Then I'll never make them again!"
Cameron is now standing in front of us at the kitchen table.

Cameron: "Fine. Then I'm leaving."

Me: "Where are you going?!"

Cameron: "On a hot air balloon, away from here."

Me: "There are no hot air balloons here, Cameron."

Cameron: "I know, but there are some in a far away land."

Me: "How are you getting to the far away land?"

Cameron: "On a jet plane."

Me: "Ok...see ya!"

Cameron (at the top of his lungs): "AND I DON'T KNOW WHEN I'LL BE BACK AGAIN!"
then he quickly marched back into the room and closed the door.

Poor boy has a rough life.

THIS...

2008-10-15T08:00:00.001-04:00

Is stirring my SOUL!

Mandy Miller of Buckhead Church in Atlanta, GA performing "How He Loves".
Song originally written by John Mark Mcmillan

In Process...

2008-10-14T09:31:00.004-04:00

In recent weeks, actually months, I've been evaluating my relationships. Relationships with old friends, new ones, with family and people I don't even know very well!

I'm realizing that life is just one big process. Whether we believe in God or not, God is ultimately using every moment of our lives to shape us into His image. Although this seems like a "yeah, so?!" kind of concept, it's really clicked with me. Almost like I've been given new eyes into the lives of the people around me!

Here's a little glimpse of my thought process in recent weeks:

If God uses every moment of our lives to shape us into His image, then...

- Who am I to judge where someone is in their spiritual journey?!
My past circumstances have formed me into who I am. Because of them, grace is so real to me! I could name off a list of people who (in my eyes) are making bad decisions in their lives. But...who am I to assume God isn't using their EVERY circumstance to one day reveal Himself to them the way he did for me years ago!! And who's to say they won't appreciate God's grace even 10 times more than I do now, as a direct result of their circumstances NOW!

- I need to love people in a REAL way... NOW!
People HATE fronts. People know when they are being tolerated, and when they're actually being loved! If you think about that for a minute, you know the difference! I tolerate a lot of people. I also love a lot of people. But it's usually the people who I "tolerate" who need to experience God's love most! I've been praying for God to place huge love in my heart for those people. He HAS! In a big , almost scary way!! I truly believe through that love, and through caring for those people in a REAL way, God will use me to open their eyes to the ultimate love of Christ!

- Keep drawing nearer to Jesus.
A long time ago, when I was a Jr. High Small group leader, Todd Tolson took us to a camp where a guy named Jeremy Kingsley taught our kids about knowing God. He said (and I'll never forget) "When we learn about God, we start knowing God. And when we know God, we start loving God. And when we love God, we start loving and caring about the same things God loves and cares about." I think about this often, and I believe that this analogy works in a big spiral backwards when I'm not continually learning about who God is!

- I have a long way to go.
As God has given me this sudden rush of compassion for people, I'm understanding that I too am still in this same process. I can't look into someone's life and pinpoint their "closeness to God", because I don't even know where I am in that process! Isn't the whole thing relative?! My "passion for God" level is based on a meter of the ways I've experienced Him in the past and now. I'd be foolish to think that I know when I've reached my closest proximity to God. Because just like now, when I can feel Him SO near, I hear Him whisper "You have NO idea. Come closer."

Closer (Flying Into Daybreak Album Version) - Charlie Hall

Leavin' on a Jet Plane!

2008-10-12T17:15:00.003-04:00

I sang this song to Cameron a few nights ago before he went to bed. Now he doesn't want to listen to or sing anything else!

Just not the same!

2008-10-12T10:38:00.005-04:00

Transitions are hard!
In our experience, transitions have been good, and necessary.
Still hard.
Our transition from San Diego to Raleigh was tricky.
And I'm not blind to the fact our transition back to SD won't be just as difficult.
Because, just as we've transitioned our lives, so has everyone and everything else!

Not everyone literally moved their families across the country twice in one year.

But as a simple result of time...everyone has changed. Everything has changed.

Routines change.
Landscapes change.
Families change.
Circles of friends change.
Habits change.
Convictions change.
People change.

I'm reminding myself a lot lately, that things will be a lot different when we get back home. It's not going to be a "pick up where we left off" kind of deal. Our life, schedule and routine didn't stop when we left San Diego. It kept right on going without us! I think I'm doing a good job preparing myself for the changes in our culture (as we knew it) in San Diego, but I don't think that will stop me from trying to force certain aspects of my life back to the way they were.

As scared as I get about going back to a different San Diego, I'm encouraged by God's continued sovereignty, His unchanging love for me, and by His never ending attributes.

God is:
Always wise,
Always sovereign,
Always just,
Always good,
Always holy,
Always merciful,
Always gracious.

In this time of another big transition, I'm clinging to the truth that
"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever". I'm so thankful that God continues to pursue and change ME! May that be my only desire! That the constant change in my life would be part of ONE process of God shaping me into becoming more like Christ.

My First Place Ballers!

2008-10-07T22:19:00.008-04:00

I’ve been waiting to write this post for a long time!
As we started settling in here in Raleigh 9 months ago, I knew that God had a huge purpose for us moving here. Even aside from starting a great church here. I immediately started sensing the things that God was going to change about me, and I also began experiencing the ways he was going to bless me as we desperately trusted our wellbeing into His hands.

On a random craigslist search for a co-ed softball team, I was connected with Kelly from “The Ballers”. I would need to try out for the team, both at the batting cages and on the field. I was nervous, but I KNEW I needed to get on a team to meet new people, so I jumped on the opportunity. Also, something about being where NO ONE knew me made it a lot easier to take risks, as odd as that seems. I guess I just figured if I had a bad tryout and wasn’t welcomed onto the team, I wouldn’t have taken it personally since no one there knew me anyway! Thankfully, I didn’t have to search for another team. Everyone graciously welcomed me on as their second baseman and I was excited to play!

At our first practice of the season, I noticed that the group of people I was about to give a few days of my week to were VERY different than me. The only way I could describe my first impression of the Ballers was “wow, these guys have some EDGE!” They definitely did not fit the all of the southern stereotypes I was expecting! I went home after the first practice thinking, “these guys are so different from any group of people I’ve ever met!” I spent a while thinking about what my role would be on the team. Not just what position I’d play, but since I was making a “first impression” I really wanted to be intentional about everything! A couple of options that floated through my head:

1. Be a Jesus freak. Jump off the edge and just let it be known that I have a relationship with God and make it known that they need Jesus too!
2. Be a hard ass just like all of them and take it and dish it like I’m perfectly capable of doing!

I knew option number 1 was risky…just for the mere fact that if I SUCKED on the field or struck out on every at bat, I’d pretty much make Jesus look like a wuss!
Option 2 sounded a little easier for me, but truth is, I gave up my “tough gal” routine a long time ago. Not to mention this option would ALSO make Jesus look bad whenever they find out we moved here to start a church! So… I decided go for my back up plan of just being…hmmm…myself! Wow!! Can’t believe it took me three tries to come up with THAT decision! And HEY, what do you know…it worked out!

Me, Kelly, and Christian hit it off immediately. We all had SO much in common. Christian is from Alabama, Kelly is from North Carolina, and I’m from southern Cali, and it was kind of scary to find out all of the similarities between the three of us and our childhoods. I remember my first “this is soooo amazing” moment when we went out to celebrate Christian’s birthday. It was my first time hanging out with the girls outside of softball. We were in Kelly’s car, driving down the road…she had her satellite radio tuned to the 90’s station! We spent most of our first few moments outside of softball singing at the top of our lungs to Bobby Brown, The Cranberries, and Keith Sweat! It was the coolest feeling it the world. Like the three of us had known each other for YEARS! I immediately felt so much love for them, and I knew they loved me! Since that day, we’ve spent so much time learning about each other’s strengths and weaknesses and we’re constantly encouraging each other to make the most out of every moment we have on earth!

The girls were both raised knowing who God was, but they had both reached a point where they we’re pretty much bored with the typical southern Baptist church. (There are literally churches on every corner)! Everyone on the team pretty much learned why my family moved to North Carolina. And although I really wanted them to check out what I knew would be a refreshing experience with God at Church at the Triangle…I wasn’t ready to make any public intercom announcements about our service times! I would pray on my way to games “God if you’re alive in me, then please somehow reveal yourself through me and make the whole church inviting thing come naturally.” It wasn’t long after that…I think our second or third game, God did His thing and opened up an opportunity. It was definitely not my most “spiritual moment” but more of an example of how God uses our brokenness for His purpose! It’s actually pretty amusing to think about the way it all played out! We lost one of our first games in our first season. After the game…everyone was just bumming! I was so mad at myself because I hit poorly on my three at bats. As we walked off the field, a PG13 rated expletive slipped out of my mouth (under my breath)! Immediately about half my team turned and looked at me, and Chris, the macho man of them all, turned to me and said “woah, did you hear that language out of the church girl’s mouth?!” “Oh CRAP” I thought to myself. I’ve done it now. I just pretty much contradicted everything I believe in and now these people are NEVER going to take my relationship with God seriously. I had to come up with something to say after Chris called me out in front of everybody. I remembered praying for God to use my brokenness to show Himself, and in that split second moment, He DID it! I turned around and was able to say “That’s what’s sweet about my church! You don’t have to be a perfect person to come learn about God and sit in service. The reason I love God so much is mostly because He loves me in spite of how screwed up I am!” On the walk to the car, Christian mentioned she wanted to find a church like the one I described! Before she attended even one service, she told me about her career in Public Relations and that she wanted to help out in that area if we needed the help!! She came to one service and immediately jumped right into a serving role. It has been such an amazing thing to watch God just tweak with Christians life!! You can read more about her awesome story here. Kelly came on our first launch service and has been coming to Church at the Triangle ever since, too! We’ve had sweet opportunities to pray with other teammates and the rest of them all pretty much know they have a standing open invitation to come with us to church every Sunday if they want! It has been so awesome to just be me and watch God work in crazy ways! He has placed a crazy passion in me for every single player on my team. I love them all so much. I’ve had the opportunity to see through the “edge” of these people, and have come to find out that they are the most CARING, KIND, and GENEROUS people that I’ve ever met! They love ME for me! They don’t judge my character and I don’t EVER feel like I have to pretend to be someone else when I’m with them. We hang out a lot and our husbands get together to talk football and bag on each other! So wonderful!

I know for a fact that when I get back to San Diego, I’ll NEVER find a team like the Ballers. This team was a God’s biggest blessing to me while we’ve been here. I hate thinking about leaving them. They’re all supportive and we’re already talking about visiting each other once we get home. I don’t even want to think about leaving them yet! We’ve only lost one game in our second season together! We’re in first place with a big lead!! We still have a few more games and rain make ups, that we need to win! I’m confident we’ll take first place this season, just because that would be an AMAZING way to end this season of softball and this season of life for my family.

I love you Chris, Luke, Timmy, Jessica, Derrick, David, Stacy, Brittany, Bradley and Josh – I’ll miss you guys so much. No one will ever replace the spot you have in my heart!

Christian and Kelly, my girlies… you have rocked my world! I couldn’t have asked God for two better friends! I love you so much.VM’s for life, baby!

GO BALLERS!

First 10 in San Diego

2008-10-01T08:48:00.003-04:00

Since the day we decided we were headed back west, I've been constantly thinking about "the first thing I'm going to do when we get back to San Diego!" There are SO many things I can't wait to do when I get home! So, today, on October 1st, the beginning of our 28 day countdown until the day of our flight, here's a list of 10 things I can't WAIT to do when we land on the sunny, West Coast!

1. Hug my mom and dad, and let them have at my boys!
2. See extended family. Grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins!
3. Get a Carne Asada Burrito from Sarita's in Spring Valley!
4. Meet with friends!
5. Get connected in a small group!
6. Cameron in pre-school!
7. Find a great softball team! (Mom and dad to come to the games!)
8. Trolley Stop Deli Pastrami and Swiss on Rye with pasta salad!
9. Playing scrabble with mom and dad!
10. Go visit our cabins in the desert!

After I finished listing these things, I realized that this list is comprised mostly of things I've taken for granted in the past. They were just part of a regular routine of our life! And I'll probably take them for granted again. But for now, I'm so thankful for those things. I'm also excited to make the last 27 days here in Raleigh great, special and memorable! We are leaving a beautiful place and a great group of friends.

Defacing Dimes.

2008-09-29T20:29:00.006-04:00

On Thursday night, September 25th, Cameron was a little bored before bed and decided to drop 6 coins in his mouth! He immediately sat up and started choking. I stuck my fingers down his throat and managed to grab a nickel that was making him choke. He sobbed and sobbed and told me that one went all the way down. After counting the coins, I realized that he indeed swallowed a dime. I wasn't too concerned, since he was breathing at that point! And he wasn't complaining about anything stuck in his throat. He was only upset about the fact it was "daddy's money" and "he's gonna be so mad at me!".

My little brother swallowed a dime when he was little, and he was just fine. So I knew I didn't need to rush Cameron to the hospital or anything. So I just googled my brains out looking for anything about what happens when kids swallow dimes. Most of what I read indicated that I was right on my instinct to just let it take it's course, but there were others that kind of worried me...like "If your kid swallowed something that he shouldn't have, take him to the ER and then drive to Child Protective services and report yourself!" WOW! That would have put a damper on my weekend!!! I decided I'd stay home and just keep an eye on my boy while he slept that night.

I knew right away that no matter how fine things were, I needed to make sure I found that dime. I didn't want it to get stuck anywhere or cause any sort of blockage in the future.

So...the search began.

I'll spare you those details.

After 4 days, I finally located the dime!!! It was such a gross, tedious and slow process digging through CRAP all week. So when I finally found it, I jumped for JOY! Steve came in the bathroom when I started cheering. He immediately thought it was a penny. But it wasn't...it just changed crazy colors while swimming through Cam's digestive tract.

I cleaned it really well and showed it to Cameron! Pretty amazing how all those Fruit Loops in a little boys body can completely change the color characteristics of a coin!

Check out the color difference in a pre and post digestive tract dime! It turned purplish, bluish green!

So many great lessons learned through this little accident!

Wall of Art!

2008-09-28T16:02:00.005-04:00

Cameron asked if he could use the magnets to rearrange things on the refrigerator. "Easy enough", I thought, so I got him a stool and let him go at it! In all of about 15 minutes, Cameron removed everything from the refrigerator, and asked us to come look at his masterpiece!

I can't figure out what I find more funny...the "creative" placement of his artwork (opening the fridge is tricky), or the fact that he had to dig in a box of photos to find a picture of his grandma and grandpa to put in the middle!!

I like to think I have a pretty smart 4 year old! But sometimes I'm convinced that his heart might turn out to be bigger than his brain! Ok by me, I guess!

No Snoopy's in Cali!

2008-09-23T10:07:00.005-04:00

As I get more and more anxious to see friends and family in SD, I can't help but to think about the many things I'm going to miss about North Carolina!
1. Snoopy's (of course, tops the list)
2. Green, lush landscape
3. Friends
4. BBQ
5. A sort of freedom away from people we know!
6. My nice, big house! (that's relative, I know!)
7. Being part of a great new spiritual movement in the community!
8. Having an opportunity to do ministry full time.
9. Riley's therapists
10. AMAZING thunderstorms!

There are so many more that I don't have time to list. There is no doubt in my mind that our plane ride home will be bitter sweet. (Although I'll probably be so busy with the kids that I won't have time to think about ANYTHING!) God blessed us with everything we prayed for here. We are so thankful and humbled to have been a part of the amazing work God is doing at Church at the Triangle. Riley has grown leaps and bounds developmentally. It's no coincidence that God has placed us in all the EXACT right places for Riley's specific needs. Amazing!

As much as we're going to miss all the things listed above, we've officially entered a season where our comfort in a nice house, and GREAT ministry isn't as important as the growth and development of our boys! (I know..."it's about time!") They've always just been along for the ride involving what Steve and I wanted to do with our lives. I'm excited to finally turn the tables and let life be about them! I'm eager for them to grow up knowing and loving their great great grandma's and grandpa's, and valuing people and family over self desires, even goals and accomplishments.

Yesterday, Mrs. Margaret (Riley's speech therapist) talked about how much she was going to miss Riley. We'll still see her through the end of next month, but it was still a sad day yesterday to break the news to her! Upon waving goodbye, Riley decided to stay outside and sit on the steps with his sad face. Cameron of course, had to get in on the pout session!

I'm hoping for a great transition. Because God loves these boys more than I could, I'm hopeful!

Faiai Update.

2008-09-17T02:22:00.010-04:00

We have been incredibly blessed to have had the opportunity to serve God in a full time ministry role at The Church at the Triangle. Although our church just barely turned a month old this week, our lead team and core group of volunteers has been at it, getting the word out, and prepping for launch for well over a year. Steve and I have been serving alongside them for almost 9 months.

Since we've been here in Raleigh, we've been able to have a sort of CSI: Miami look into God's heart, and the things that matter most to Him. Topping that list is undoubtedly an intensified passion for the "lost" and making the True Living God REAL to the people who have never experienced Him in that way before. I truly believe there is NOTHING more rewarding than being used by God to show others the grace, hope, love and new life found in Christ.

We've made life long friends in the short time we've been in Raleigh. Steve and I have learned more about each other and our marriage. We've seen Cameron and Riley grow from babies into sweet little boys. We've been able to look at our past from a different perspective, and we're more thankful than EVER for every role in ministry we've had in the past 12 years.

As much as we love Church at the Triangle and our community, Steve and I have decided we're not the right people for the role that this church needs to reach its greatest potential. In recent months we've had an increasing concern about the well being of our boys as we've recklessly thrown ourselves into the HUGE task of church planting. Steve and I both hold a lot of value in having grown up with family always very close by. I know God is honored by the fact that we left home and our comfort to serve Him across the country for this period of time. But, more than anything God has shown us that Cameron and Riley are missing out on such a rich life in San Diego with the people who love and care for them most! Our calling into full time ministry has been absolutely put in check by this realization. With Riley's increasing health needs and Cameron's apparent love for his friends and family, our next season of life will focus less on our calling into church ministry and more on our calling and conviction to the ministry of our family.

We are so thankful to have friends and family in San Diego who will undoubtedly welcome us back with open arms. We are also torn and sad about leaving the amazing friends God has blessed us with here in the past 9 months.

Our current role at Church at the Triangle will be finished at the end of this month (September). The lease on our apartment isn't up until February, but thanks to the complex management, they were able to let us out of our lease early! We plan to be home by the end of October! We had NO IDEA how this would happen, but God has been faithful in each step so far, and we're praying that trend continues, as we continue to seek His will for our lives!

There's so much more to this process than simply finding a way to get ourselves and our stuff home. We'll need to find a place to live right away. We're also asking God to provide Steve with a great full time job in retail sales. He's never been able to give up his love for working with everyday people in a retail environment. So instead of doing it on the side, Steve's excited about finding an opportunity to do it full time. Please pray for us in this way. I'm confident that I'll be able to get the kids acclimated fairly quickly. I'm praying that there won't be a lapse in Riley's medical and therapy needs. These are such BIG needs, but there's not a doubt in our minds that God will provide. He's been so faithful!

We're leaving Raleigh with no regrets! We love it here. We are absolutely honored to have had the privilege to serve here with Lee and Carla and so many others! We're looking forward to hearing about the GREAT things God is going to do in the life of Church at the Triangle! Thanks to everyone who has prayed for CATT and for us this year. Your prayers have been felt throughout the duration of this season. For that we are so grateful!

God has given me so much peace and confidence personally through the psalms in the most recent weeks. I've been carrying this one around in my head wherever I go!

"Trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) in the Lord and do good; so shall you dwell in the land and feed surely on His faithfulness, and truly you shall be fed. Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord [roll and repose each care of your load on Him]; trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) also in Him and He will bring it to pass." - Psalm 37:3-5 (amplified)

What a great promise!!

Please note: Only family and a couple of close friends have heard about our journey back west. Posting the news on The Other Cause was the easiest way to get the word out while I'm still making phone calls to inform the people I want to update personally. We love you and can't WAIT to be home! Thanks!

Cameron's First Bike!

2008-09-09T20:19:00.002-04:00

Cameron was completely surprised and jumping up and down when found out the "HUGE" box delivered by UPS was for HIM! My mom sent it, of course!! He wanted to wait until Wednesday (his birthday) to open it, but it might rain on his birthday so we decided to open it today! I put it together while he was taking a nap! Needless to say, he was a VERY happy boy when he woke up and saw his bike put together. Although, he was a little bit sad that he wouldn't get to sleep next to the "huge" package anymore. Oh well!

I don't think he'll be any sort of BMX racer...considering he was more excited about ringing the bell than actually pedaling and going fast. He said his bike was the "best in the world!" And there's no better feeling in the world than seeing my boys happy and loving life!

Tomorrow will be even more special as we celebrate his 4th birthday! (post coming soon!)
Here are some pictures of the boys and their bikes today!

Riley's Journey

2008-09-03T12:58:00.001-04:00

Find out results from Riley's ABR testing today - HERE

Mommy's Helpers!

2008-09-01T22:48:00.007-04:00

I'm so glad I don't have to fold laundry anymore!
(Another boring video for Grandma and Grandpa!)

Laundry! from Lauren Faiai on Vimeo.

I was thankful to have so much help today. Although we did end up REWASHING a lot of the clothes since most of them were dragged around the house while they were being folded! Oh, another thing I should mention... The Happy Meal Riley was eating was a day old. Somehow it ended up in the fridge, and he decided he would finish eating it today. Ice cold french fries! Yum!! I didn't realize until after I watched the video that Riley thought I told him to tell CAMERON bye at the end, when I actually told him to tell the CAMERA bye!

If you need help doing laundry, I have the perfect team for you!

Special Delivery!

2008-08-28T16:58:00.003-04:00

Today was a special day for Cameron! (It doesn't take much!)
Today Cameron sent out his very first package to his two very favorite people in San Diego, Grandma and Grandpa! He very thoughtfully picked out a bunch of really neat things that he knew his Grandma and Grandpa would LOVE! (Don't get too excited, mom and dad.) I had no idea how special this event would be for my boy, but it was!! He excitedly jumped up and down pretty much the entire time we were in the mail center!

I have decided that I should make sending mail a regular routine with my boys!! It's easy, cheap, and the experience is incredibly fun!! Maybe I should let Cameron mail my bills. He'd definitely have more fun with that than I do!!

Lot's of love and cooking!!

2008-08-26T17:47:00.007-04:00

Since we've been married for 5 years now.
See picture:

And since I had a great idea tonight...
and since I was hungry...
I decided tonight was going to be home made pizza night.

Steve's Pizza: BBQ Chicken with Onion, Garlic and Mozzarella
Lauren's Pizza: Chicken, Artichoke, Feta, Sundried Tomato and Basil Pesto

And...for the record. MINE WON! Although, the BBQ pizza was very delicious. I was the only judge of course. Steve loved both. And so did the boys. If my mom was here, she definitely would have liked mine the best!

Riley also used his own original recipe to make his lunch today.

Riley was served chicken and stars soup, with 4 pretzels and 3 chips on the side.
Riley decided all of the ingredients would probably taste better all stirred and mixed together. So...that's what he did!

And he ate the WHOLE THING!!

We're Launched!

2008-08-24T13:47:00.007-04:00

Today was a great day! Our team was in sync, the place looked great, people came, and God showed up in a BIG way! We've worked so hard for this day for so long, and the service went great! I could list our service order, and tell you all of the great points of the message in this post, but more powerful than the music, more powerful than the message or any media pieces we used, were the AMAZING stories that came out of today! Every person who showed up today had an incredible story about how they landed at Church at the Triangle today. The one I'm most excited about right now is Josh's story.

Finding musicians in Raleigh is no easy task. Steve has been working hard at getting just a few band members to commit a few Sunday's to us. We've had lots of great leads and even promises from people, but we've had even more closed doors. Needless to say, this stress ball (me) has been FREAKING OUT about trying to find people to play. Seriously, banging my head against a wall would be more enjoyable. Steve, of course, never stressed. He kept reminding me: "We're here doing exactly what God has called us to do right now. He's faithful, and in total control of EVERYTHING." After reminding myself of that a few dozen times, I decided to do what I always feel led to do when I'm in a bind...pray, then type www.craigslist.com into my web browser! I forget where I found that passage of scripture.

Anyway...

I posted an ad on Craigslist that read "Need a bass player for THIS Sunday. Willing to compensate, must be able to read simple chord charts and make a 2 hour rehearsal on Saturday night." In the hour after I published the post, I got about 12 inquiries. (People like last minute stuff on CL, just FYI.) I responded to the one that said he had his own gear and that he could read chord charts. His name was Josh. Steve called him and asked to meet him at a mall nearby where he could give him a cd of the songs we're playing along with some music charts. When Steve got home, I asked "what he thought of the guy". He said he seemed to know what he was talking about, he's in his early 30's. He told Steve: "I've never played in any kind of church, are you ok that I'm Jewish?" It was, of course, ok. It was great! He came to rehearsal on Saturday, waited WAY to long for us to set up, plugged in his equipment, and played each song lick for lick. He didn't need any coaching and was able to sync right up with our drummer immediately! I was so happy to know that he was going to be a GREAT add for our launch service. After the walk through on Saturday, we were all chatting and walking to our cars. Josh then told Steve "Hey, I know you're paying me for this weekend (we payed him close to zip-o), but if tomorrow works out, and you think it sounds good, do you think I could maybe start playing with you for free on Sunday's?" Of course, we had to do a lot of thinking about that. NOT!! Steve arranged to meet with him this week to learn more about Josh's story, go over songs, and what the next few weeks look like! They're even going to check out some venues Josh is familiar with to try and find more local musicians. We were simply amazed at how the whole thing happened! Full credit to the faithfulness of God!

On our way home from the walk through, Steve and I were in the middle of talking about how great Josh was, and how bad I felt for making him stand around for so long on Saturday, Steve got a text. It was Josh. His text said "That was fun, bro! Thanks for having me!" I seriously got goosebumps because of the timing of that text. Not only did he not freak out about waiting around, but he enjoyed his time!" Sweet!

Josh showed up this morning excited to play. We played an awesome worship set, he was able to sit in for the message, and he hung around to talk to everyone afterwards! He'll be playing with us regularly! As excited as I am to have Josh here as a GREAT bass player, I'm even more excited that he's going to start being part of a community of Christ followers! So Cool!!

There are plenty more stories just like that one that came out of today! I'm sure I'll share more in the coming weeks. Pictures of CATT's first official service soon to come!! Thanks to everyone who's been praying!

Just helpin' out!

2008-08-22T17:10:00.007-04:00

Riley hates the grocery store. He doesn't like sitting in carts at ALL! I had to take him to the store to buy some basics, and today Riley LOVED the grocery store!

Why?! Because today he had a purpose!!

I found this cart inside the store and thought he'd enjoy pushing his cart while I pushed mine! It was definitely the LOUDEST cart in the store, and whenever he got near someone he'd abandon his cart right in their way and run to me in embarrassment! But for the most part, Riley was focused and determined to get everything he needed! And didn't need. We ended up putting back the dog bones, hair dye, and Flamin' Hot Cheeto's.

I let him go ahead of me as we got in line to check out. He haphazardly decided to mosey his cart right on down the line of the other four people who were ahead of us. And even started handing his items to the checkout lady at that point. They got a good laugh, and I had a little talk with him about the rules of the grocery store!

As crazy as he was, I'm very happy my boy had a great time being mommy's helper today!

5 Years as a Faiai!

2008-08-21T23:40:00.004-04:00

Tomorrow night, Steve and I will celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary! When I think about the past 5 years, I just get happy!!! The time went by so fast! I've noticed a trend of how we love each other more and more every year!! I'm pretty sure that's a good thing!! Steve is my soul mate and my best friend! He has an incredible heart for God and people, and I am SOOO blessed to be married to that heart!! His passion for ministry and for me and the boys is powerful, and one that I truly don't believe I could find anywhere else on earth!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, babe!! I'm so glad I get to do this crazy life with you. I can't wait until year 10! Hmm...I'll be 31 years old then!!! EW! I can wait!!

This picture was taken last year on our anniversary! It's the only one I had of the two of us! Guess I need to take more pictures!

And We're Rollin, Rollin, Rollin on the River...

2008-08-19T04:46:00.004-04:00

This past week (actually, couple of weeks) have been challenging for me, to say the least. There's no doubt the enemy is at work as God is doing miracles here at CATT. We have such a strong team with so much talent, experience, knowledge, heart and diligence. I am so thankful we've been placed here to do ministry with our great lead team of Lee, Carla, Steve, Linda, and the rest of our incredible core team.

I was told from the very beginning that this adventure would be "the hardest thing I'll ever do"! I believed it, and now I'm experiencing it. I've experienced emotional frustration in just missing home. Missing my friends who know me and love me for ME. Missing my family. Missing the people who love my boys. I've missed the little but important things like all my friends and family who would love to watch Cam play soccer and see the look on his face after he received his award at vacation bible school. I've recently been physically sick with just weird random crap.

Anyway...The only way I can describe this recent struggle is through a picture I've had in my head in the past few days. I wrote the following text in my journal last night. It's rather candid, but a pretty good look into my core.

"God, I hate this cheesy thought in my head about the rope. But I can't find a better way to describe me. The circumference of the rope is bigger than my grasp. But I decide to climb it anyway. I try for way too long just to get two feet off the ground. But when I do, it's rewarding and motivating! I continue to work my way up inch by inch, encouraged by every move closer to the goal. As I glance down, to see the distance I've gained, I realize I still have so much further to go. I'm suddenly tired. Panic sets in. My hands start slipping. In weighing out my options, I'm suddenly encouraged by the fact I'm not too far from the ground. If I just let go, I could easily find my feet to the floor and walk away with minimal bruises or scrapes. After all...it's 'just a rope'. No one has forced me to climb it. I have nothing to prove to anyone... and I HATE climbing rope anyway..."

After a big dose of evaluation this week, I've realized that if I let go of the rope, I'd let go of the one thing I've been begging God for all along. More purpose, being part of something "bigger than myself" and following his calling on my life. God has given me such a deep passion for people far from Him since we've been here. Although I so badly wish my kids were surrounded by the people who love them the most, I want them more importantly to experience God's love and His faithfulness in their (our) obedience to Him...even when it's hard!

I've been soaking in God's word through the Gospels of Matthew and Mark in the past few weeks. I'm being constantly reminded of God's faithfulness to those who had faith in Him. Every miracle is followed by some sentence like "because of your faith, you are healed". Every time God chose not to do a miracle, He follows by saying "Because of your lack of faith".

I love that God has revealed this "faith factor" to me. It encourages me in 2 big ways.

1. I don't have to rely on my own strength! Nor does God ask or even want me to! My job is only to abide in Him!
“If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it shall be done for you.” John 15:7

2. He is faithful to those who seek Him! We've experienced His incredible blessing through simply trusting in Him! Clinging to those moments are a KEY factor for me!

I'd love it if you'd pray for our church this week. Our official launch is this Sunday, August 24th, at 10:30am! I am so excited to finally "officially" be a church!! I'm stoked about my friends who are coming! And I'm just looking forward to meeting more people as this thing gets going!

Here are a few things that I'll ask personally for you to pray for!
1. A great service on Sunday morning!

2. In the midst of hard work, and focus, that we'd do what we do with JOY! And that people would be moved by the joy we have in serving.

3. People! We still need lots of help! And more people to help spread the word!

4. Against the enemy and all of the ways he tries to throw us off track.

5. Physical strength. This is no doubt one of the enemy's ruthless ploys. I've had crazy headaches in the past few weeks. I NEVER get headaches. Also, Last night on my way home, after a great time with some girlfriends, I got really REALLY sick. When I got home, I felt completely lethargic and could not move. I stayed up all night puking. No, not pregnant. I checked!!! But please pray that I, along with the rest of our team, remain physically strong this week and right on through launch.

6. For the lost. There are sooo many, TOO MANY, people who are far from God in our community. CATT has an incredible, different message from anywhere else in the bible belt! People want to hear it. We want to share it with them! Pray that THOSE people come!

7. Mi Familia. Pray God protects us as we're just busy. Riley has a hearing appointment this week, and a bunch of therapy. I want to do a much better job at spending more time with him working on the things that will help him to develop normally. Also for Cameron. He's such a sponge and is really soaking in and reflecting my behavior lately. I see my anxiety in him, and that just grips me. Thankfully Steve is a freaking ROCK! He's loving every moment here and knows how to keep focussed despite all of the things I get hung up on!!!

All of that to say...there is no doubt in my mind that God is doing something BIG right now!
I am excited about the days, weeks and months ahead. The softball season starts back up tonight! So I'm planing on feeling better today so that I can do well and love that group of people that I've been placed in! Thanks so much for praying and just caring about my family! Also, thanks to everyone who took portions out of their day to meet with Steve when he made his trip out west! He was so blessed to see everyone. We love you all so much!

Back to the grind! Launch update soon to come.

Good Things!

2008-08-11T19:24:00.003-04:00

I've posted before about how there are certain things that happen during the day that have the tendency to melt my heart. One of those moments happened this afternoon.

Today's heart melting moment: Cameron and Riley's reaction when they received a photo of their grandma and grandpa in the mail today! Their faces LIT UP like I haven't seen in a long time! They love their grandma and grandpa so much. I was reminded of that today. Heart melting, for sure!

Thanks for the picture, Aunt Dani!

Tell the Story!!

2008-08-05T22:19:00.002-04:00

It's crunch time at CATT! We're just a couple weeks from launch, and we are busting our tails trying to get everything accomplished by August 24th! It's almost scary to see that date so close!!

I was worried about Steve leaving this week for San Diego. I don't like feeling the sort of pressure (of time) I feel...especially alone! But I knew he had to go. Kind of a "now or never" sort of deal. Steve booked his entire 3 days with meeting after meeting, appointment after appointment. As busy as he's been, it's been so awesome to hear his excitement! As he shares the CATT story and dream over and over again, I just know his soul is totally encouraged! He calls me after every meeting to let me know how it went, and as he describes his conversations, I can't help but to just thank GOD for His faithfulness in what He's doing in our church!!

I think sometimes when I get caught up in the busy work of it all, I miss out on a broader perspective! I'm realizing that I need to tell the CATT story to more people more often! Even if it's just to the mirror in my bathroom! I need to tell it! Not just because it's a great story, but because it's such a cool reminder of Gods calling, His provision, direction, and how he's been faithful!!

I am thrilled that Steve got to be with his best friends this week! I know he's just pumped about being there and telling the story! I am so proud to be his wife! Steve's worked NON-stop since he's been there, which is a good thing! Because...if I was the one visiting...you can bet I'd be at mom and dad's house playing scrabble the whole time, and hanging out with my favorite girls...just having a good time!

I can't wait for Steve to get home! I know he's getting anxious to be back too! I'm glad he's coming back with a clear mind and focussed heart!!

Rough Day.

2008-08-02T19:31:00.004-04:00

I woke up with a lump in my throat this morning. I knew I wasn't physically sick. I just felt emotionally sick for some reason. As I went about the routine of the day... soccer, church stuff, and family time, I tried to put my finger on why I feel the way I do. In my brain, I made a list.

1. Pressure of our official church launch in 21 days!!

2. The anxiety of my car issues this past week.

3. Pressure in finding a few GREAT musicians...fast.

4. The way God is making my heart ache more and more for the lost.

5. The stress of knowing Steve is going to be away from us, and across the country for the next 3 days.

6. My constant awakening to the different spiritual culture here in the south.

I assumed all of those things added up to make the one big knot in my stomach... until I overheard a conversation Cameron was having with my dad this afternoon.

I sat next to Cam while he told his grandpa about soccer and his drawings and lots of other crazy stuff. And then out of no where I heard Cameron say (in a really sad voice), "Grandpa, I sure miss you. I really wish I could go with daddy to see you."

I felt my heart shrink like it does at the end of any sappy love story, and I realized...
Although I'll miss Steve and his help this week, the reason I'm so weepy is because Steve will be face to face with my mom and dad in less than 24 hours...and I wish SOOO bad that I could see them too. I miss my parents every single day I'm here. And I know they miss me too. They pretend to just miss my boys!!! But I know without a doubt they miss me too! And I just want to hug them so bad!
(I'm weeping again...GEEZ!)

Cameron was sad when he got off the phone, and I promised him that we'd have a really fun time together while daddy is away! Just looking at that boy brings me joy! And my Riley boy...he loves me in such a special way. I attribute that to the sweet times I had with him in the ICU while he recovered from his surgery not so long ago!

We're going to make the next few days GREAT ones!

Anyway...I'm hoping that by writing this all out, it might relieve some of the heartache I feel tonight. Probably not. But oh well! Mom and dad, if you're reading this come back soon. Cameron and Riley miss you... and so do I!

Friends of Riley's Journey

2008-08-01T09:53:00.003-04:00

We need a bunch of people praying this week for Max. Max is a friend of Riley's Journey. Find out more at http://rileyjamesfaiai.blogspot.com.

6AM Wake Up Call!

2008-07-30T09:37:00.002-04:00

I heard my sliding glass door open at 6AM this morning. When I went out, I learned that it was chalk time on the patio! Glad they know how to keep each other company!

Soccer Week 2

2008-07-27T20:04:00.008-04:00

This week, Cameron improved in the area of confidence! Which in turn allowed him to improve in the area of skill! My boy did GREAT! Maybe it was the new haircut! He was determined not to get upset if he did something wrong this time. He actually told me during a water break that "this is the best day of my whole life!" Although he says that about something almost everyday, I was still really happy he was having a great time!

He learned how to kick the ball with the inside of his foot at this second practice. He also learned to use that technique in a passing drill.

I'm realizing that I'm in probably what will be one of my "favorite stages" of my sons lives! We're having so much fun just watching them become who they're going to grow up to be!! One thing being so far away from home does is allow me to not take for granted any moment with my boys. I hold captive each word, each kiss, each hug, and milestone they accomplish. They are so precious to me! I'm a proud west coast mommy, raising southern boys! How cool is that?!!

Riley's 2nd Birthday Party!

2008-07-25T22:53:00.009-04:00

Today we had a great time with new friends, celebrating Riley's second birthday! We were so busy, that I was able to forget about being sad about not sharing this special day with my extended family. I miss them so much. Here are a few highlights!

Thanks to EVERYONE who came!

Riley was all poses on his special day! "CHEESE!"

Mommy and her boys!

The guys grilled, while the girls chilled

A party aint a party without my GIRLS!!!

Riley made sure EVERYONE had enough food!

A little competition for the boys!

And Riley opened lots of fun presents!

They got tired of me taking pictures of them!

After dinner, we went back to the house for cake and ice cream!!

Jammed a little...

...and played A LOT!

mmmm....CAKE!

Riley had so much fun today! It was sooo cool to see Riley warm up to people he'd never met before!

Happy birthday, my boy! Mommy loves you!!

Happy Birthday Riley James!

2008-07-24T08:39:00.001-04:00

Cameron's Songs July 2008 from Lauren Faiai on Vimeo.

Cameron...being Cameron!

2008-07-22T23:44:00.004-04:00

One day I'll get equipment to make these videos better quality. For now...
Cameron would like to read you his favorite story! (He still has a little cold!)

Cameron July 22, 2008 from Lauren Faiai on Vimeo.

Tune in tomorrow for Cameron's song for his brother!

The Fro Must Go!

2008-07-22T16:12:00.004-04:00

Loved the fro, but in the dead heat of summer (103 degrees today), we decided it was time.

There's a kids haircut place called Snippits across the street from our house. Cameron was able to watch a movie while he got his haircut!

I think he's carrying 10 less pounds around today!

I told him that since he looks more grown up now, he has to ACT like a grown up. I figured that wasn't too much to ask.

Soon we'll figure out what to do with brother's hair!!

iPod Juice

2008-07-20T11:12:00.006-04:00

One thing my iPod touch doesn't do well is...stay on my arm when I'm running on the treadmill. It's just lame. So my sweet loverman went out and got me a new iPod shuffle. I think he really only bought it for me so that I wouldn't use the largeness of my iTouch as an excuse not to work out...oh well...it worked! I love my shuffle! I love that I can just clip it on my shirt, turn it up LOUD and tune out the kids while I clean my house! Sometimes I even forget my kids are home! Yes, THAT wonderful...until...I find permanent Sharpie marker all over my closet doors. (BTW, does anyone know how to fix that w/o removing paint? And NO, the magic eraser doesn't work.)

Anyway... onto my top five favorite jams, for now:

1. All I Want to Do - Sugarland
(Loved their performance on CMA's)

2. With You - Jessica Simpson
(I forgot about this song until a week ago. Love it!)

3. Jesus Messiah - Chris Tomlin
(We've been rockin' this one on Sunday's. Nice.)

4. I'm Yours - Jason Mraz
(My Aunt Nita has an awesome story about this song - HERE)

5. You'll Come - Hillsong United
(Pretty powerful new one from Brooke.)

Listen to them, buy them, get an iPod shuffle, and ROCK OUT!

Livin' it up!

2008-07-19T22:03:00.004-04:00

Just in case anyone thought he never gets any attention. Here's all of Cameron's girlfriends. He's pretty comfortable in this environment!

I'm Done

2008-07-19T18:43:00.008-04:00

We left the house at 8:00AM for Cameron's first soccer practice. He was so excited. The whole way there, Cameron just couldn't stop telling us how happy he was to play soccer. He was very confident too! "Mom and dad, you're not going to believe this!" He was referring to how awesome he was going to be!! That should have been my forewarning! Cameron did a great job at following instructions, and he did a great job dribbling the ball up and down the field! About 30 minutes into the practice, they started a drill where the kids had to dribble the ball down the field, and then STOP it, and put their foot on top of the ball. Cameron started dribbling, then when it came time to stop the ball, his foot missed and the ball kept rolling. He walked over to get his ball, and when he turned around, he looked at me in full fledged TEARS! He wasn't crying loud. He was just being very discreetly upset. I ran out there to ask him what was wrong! I thought he hurt himself, because he was REALLY upset. He could barely tell me, but I understood. "Mom, I didn't stop the ball with my foot! I'm not good at soccer. I'm done, and I don't want to play anymooooorrrre!" He started walking towards the door, as I tried to explain to him what practice is all about! They started a different drill, and I was able to get his mind off of the mental breakdown he was in. He did fine the rest of the practice...we just gave him LOTS more high fives for the rest of the time. I'm hoping these next 7 weeks of soccer help him to develop some thicker skin, but at the same time, I love that my boy has a sensitive heart! And I'm glad he wants to be great at whatever he does!!

After soccer we went straight to our band rehearsal at the church. I didn't have a babysitter, and Krystle was working, so both boys went with me to rehearsal. It was pretty crazy, to say the least. Steve introduced a new team member to our band and also to CATT today, who will start playing with us in a few weeks. We're really excited about Seth. I was able to walk around with Riley in his stroller and get him to sleep for a few minutes. Which gave me just enough time to yell at my other son for walking in the public mens bathroom in his socks.

When we got home, I was glad to have no plans for the evening...until Steve told me he had another meeting. I got all my work done for this Sunday earlier in the week, so tonight I'm going to work on stuff for the next two weekends, maybe have a cup of coffee, and then make it bedtime!

It seemed like every highlight of the day came with a low. We got a lot accomplished this week. We met a bunch of new people, got a ton of work done, and we got Cameron involved in his first sport.

You'd think I'd feel exhilarated and accomplished. I don't. I feel tired, worn out, and just done! I'm hoping tomorrow breathes fresh life into these dry bones!!! If not, I'm sneaking away for a 3 day vacation to the beach next week!

HA. Fat chance!

CATT UPDATE - JULY 16

2008-07-16T09:15:00.008-04:00

Since my last update (too long ago) we've been busy assembling teams within our core to prepare for launch. This process has been a lot of work, but has also been very exhilarating for each of us. As we watch God put the pieces together, we can't help but to be just PUMPED about our launch date. When "all systems go" in 5 weeks!

Our team has kept in mind that a lot of what we're doing is against logic and would really leave any experienced church planter concerned! One of these things is the fact we're launching in August. Just when we thought our summer slump would hit, we were thrusted into some crazy momentum. People started bringing handfuls of friends, Lee spoke vision, and people are coming back every weekend...with more friends! We've been able to implement things like a service run through into our rehearsal, as well as increase our number of band members. We're incorporating 2 or 3original songs into our setlists EVERY weekend. You can listen to some of our scratch tracks on the column to the right. More will be added as we record them.

Here are a few pictures from our services in the past few weekends.

Childrens Ministry

Youth Ministry (F3) - Sunday Nights at 6:30PM

This building we're meeting in now will turn in to our office space when we launch, at which point we'll move across the hallway to our new building.

During our service 2 weeks ago, Lee took us over to the new building where he led us in a time of prayer where we were able to pray over every chair in the room.

We prayed that each chair would be filled by the unchurched and dischurched people in our community when we launch in August. We prayed that God would make us desparate. We prayed he'd give us more faith, and that he would fill us with passion to see lost people reached and given the message of Hope. Needless to say, this was a pretty intense prayer session. God as broken each one of us in that room. We are utterly desperate for Him in our everyday lives and in the life of Church at the Triangle.

We'd really appreciate your prayers in the next 5 weeks leading into launch. Whether you believe in God or not, I'd love it if you'd help me pray in the following ways:

1. That God would continue to do amazing things in the relationships we're building outside of church. We're finalizing details of a couple BIG events (family day, battle of the bands etc...) that we're inviting the entire community to. Pray that our minimal advertising would go viral through word of mouth, and that our community would love these events.

2. Pray for our vision meeting THIS THURSDAY night. That many people would come, hear vision, and get involved.

3. Workers for Children's ministry. We have a good group of kids and not enough workers!

4. Funds and resources. That God would provide.

5. Momentum. That our momentum as a church would continue to increase.

If you can or would like to help us in more ways besides praying, please contact me at lfaiai@churchatthetriangle.com . We need YOU!

Big thanks to all my favorite TOC junkies for reading, praying and keeping updated!

Fun in the Sun! And pictures...YAY!

2008-07-12T22:13:00.006-04:00

After a lot of cursing and throwing things against walls, I finally convinced my favorite digital camera to come back to life! We had a fun day today, and I was able to capture a few of those moments on my stubborn camera!

We signed Cameron up for soccer today. I have NO idea where his interest in soccer came from, but that's all he wants to do during the day. Play soccer...in the house, at the park...anywhere. So today, I found him a class and signed him up! He is very excited! And, so are Steve and I! We both remembered the day (before we were married) when we talked about how cool it was going to be to have kids and be able to go to their sporting events. I can't help but to smile when I think about the fact that we're going to be watching Cameron's first soccer practice next Saturday! That is SOOO awesome!

We bought him a ball (his size) and some cones to practice with. He was able to kick the ball around the grass during our community cookout today in our development.

He kept the same evil look on his face the entire time he kicked the ball around!

Don't ask me why he was wearing pants when it was 98 degrees outside today. He changes clothes about 10 times per day.

Christian brought over Peyton, the sweet little girl she's babysitting this weekend. We had a great time in the pool. Riley James would NOT stop hugging and kissing the poor girl! She was pretty irritated with him by the end of the day! I'm excited we'll see both of them at church in the morning!

And although Cameron did NOT want to go to sleep at his regular bedtime tonight, he finally fell asleep. But, at some point, he managed to sneak into the closet to grab his soccer ball that I told him he "ABSOLUTELY" wasn't allowed to sleep with since he didn't go to bed on time.

Oh well...I'm a sucker. This picture was too sweet. I just couldn't bring myself to get mad about him taking the ball to bed. I don't know why I even told him no in the first place. I'm so happy he's excited about playing soccer. I think I'll let him sleep with it every night. Especially if it might increase his chances of being a GREAT athlete someday!!!

Oh Brother!

2008-07-11T18:06:00.004-04:00

My camera recently said goodbye to the world, so...I'm anxious to get a new one so I can start taking some quality pictures. I had to post these ones today, though. I love how much Cameron and Riley are looking like each other. They have the exact same head of hair, and they NEVER get tired of playing together!

Cameron Lee - Almost 4 Years Old

Riley James - Almost 2 Years Old

Say "CHEESE" boys!

Grand Design

2008-07-10T21:33:00.007-04:00

It's Official! I know I'm WAY more excited about this than I should be! So...sorry for the hype. But I cannot tell you how stoked I am about Riley's story being featured on the Jorge Posada Foundation Website! I got an email a couple days ago, from the foundations creative director. He sent me a link to a preview site where I could see where Riley would be featured before they launched their new site. The site went live today! I'm just amped up at the opportunity I have to speak hope into families struggling through the same situations we've gone through with our sweet boy in the past year and a half.

As I was thinking about this post today, I was listening in the car to Jill Phillip's song "Grand Design". The lyrics humbled me in a powerful way. They speak into a time when I was scared, with endless questions. They also speak into this moment today. When even though Riley has a long road ahead, today, I'm experiencing a piece of God's grand design for my Riley James and his journey with craniosynostosis. That his story might be hope. Even maybe to just one person.

Here are the lyrics:

"I knew it all along that this day was coming
Even though I knew it doesn’t hurt any less
But somehow the suffering draws me to You
I could start running in anger
But then what’s the point of a Savior
I feel the pain but it still doesn’t change who You are
Nothing I feel is outside of the reach of Your arms
My whole world could crumble but all of the pieces remain
In Your hands that are waiting to put them together again
Just like I know You will in Your own time, in Your own wisdom
One day I’ll look back and see the grand design
Maybe it will make sense then, these questions I have
But with it all here front and center
Sometimes it’s hard to remember
I could start running in anger
But then what’s the point of a Savior".

Download the song, or at least listen to the snippet here.

Riley is featured here on the Jorge Posada Foundation website.

To visit the foundation's main page, visit:
www.jorgeposada.com/foundation
Riley's Journey is found under the "programs" link.

(note- this post will be duplicated on Riley's Blog)

Family Day!

2008-07-08T19:02:00.003-04:00

I am so stoked it's summer!! My calendar is packed with fun things to do. Most of them are FREE, and all of them are within 5 minutes from our house. Today Krystle and I took the boys to a movie at Regal Cinemas where they're having a Free Family Movie Festival. Every Tuesday and Wednesday, the theater opens up for a free showing of two different kids movies. We are able to bring our own food in without hassle and watch a movie in air conditioning for free! The other cool thing about this is, we're able to just walk to the movie theater because it's in the shopping center right across the street from my house!

After the movie, we walked home in just enough time for a nap! Both boys went to bed without incident, and I was able to get some work done while they slept!

When the boys woke up, Cameron did his chores and Riley pretended to have chores. Soon after that it was time for family night (kids eat free) at Chick-fil-a! Also walking distance, in the shopping center across the street! Dinner at any restaurant with both kids is always a little too hectic for me, but it's definitely worth the free meal and even craft time! By the way, if you go into Chick-fil-a dressed like a cow on Friday, you get a free meal! Cameron was able to get a head start on his costume at the craft table today! Tomorrow we'll start off our day with toddler reading time at Barnes and Noble, right across the street!!

I love summer. I love it because it's warm. I love it because there are lot's of fun things to do outdoors. But I think I love it most because life feels a little bit more structured and intentional when I can plan out each day with fun things to do with the kids!

Fireworks

2008-07-07T02:16:00.004-04:00

On Saturday night, the kids and I sat in the house and watched and incredible thunderstorm. Cameron called it "God's fireworks". All other fireworks shows were canceled in our area due to rain, so I was happy that Cameron was technically seeing the fireworks he'd been waiting all weekend for!

The lightening was very close to us. I knew this because usually there is no sound when lightening strikes. Only when the thunder rolls, a few seconds later. Well...we could hear big bangs with the lightening strikes. Like explosions. They almost sounded like something was crashing into a metal shed. Our power flickered a few times, and we heard sirens. Lots of them. A couple firetrucks came into our complex, and I noticed they were driving all the way back to where our development meets a country club golf course. Because I love the excitement of, well... anything exciting, I grabbed Cameron, and my umbrella and we decided to go for a walk to ask the firemen questions! We got about four feet from my front door when I saw another flash of lightening and realized I was holding an umbrella, and my child, and decided that I was a dork and was glad no one saw me with my umbrella outside. (At least, I hope they didn't!)

The storm went on into the middle of the night. Today on the news I heard the story of a house in Brier Creek (our community) that was struck by lightening during the storm in the early hours of Sunday morning. The house was just a mile away from mine, right near the country club. I don't think I've ever been so close to lightening. I'm glad my house didn't get struck! And I hope I didn't just jinx myself!

Here's one of the houses struck:

Here's the article: House Struck By Lightening in Brier Creek
CRAZINESS! Now I'm glued to the weather channel!!

Just because...

2008-07-05T15:39:00.004-04:00

Lately I've been thinking about the things that fascinate me about my boys. There are different characteristics in both of them that just make me fall so deep in love with them...over and over and over.

Here's just a partial list of some of the ways Cameron and Riley melt my heart in this stage of their lives!

1. I can't help but to want to jump up and down and shout for JOY every time Riley says a new word, or shows a new sign! He makes me SO PROUD to be his mommy.

2. I love the way Cameron hugs his brother....which happens almost EVERY time he sees him. He is crazy about Riley and that warms my soul!!

3. I love how Riley says goodnight and I love you to everyone in the house before he goes down for a nap or to sleep at night. He never forgets anyone. Sometimes I think he's stalling when he does this. But most of the time (all the time) it makes me smile and think about him grown up with a thoughtful heart.

4. I love how AWESOME Cameron plays with his friends. He has such a sensitive heart, and I knew the transition here away from his friends in SD would be hard. He has done such a great job at adjusting, and has truly found a best buddy in Kai. I'm so comforted in knowing Cameron has found a friend besides Riley!!

5. I love it when Riley plays the "no kisses" game with me. When I ask him for a kiss and he won't come to give me one, I act like I don't want one. It NEVER fails...he's always demanding kisses when I pretend to turn them down!

Both of my boys are growing before my eyes. They love me and Steve more than ANYTHING ON EARTH. I really couldn't ask for a bigger gift than the devoted love I receive from my children.

Riley's Journey & the Jorge Posada Foundatio

2008-07-04T09:07:00.003-04:00

Excerpt from Riley's Journey -

"...I was thrilled to hear someone talk about Craniosynostosis on one of the nations top morning shows. I immediately searched for and found the Jorge Posada Foundation website. After searching through it, I emailed them to tell them about Riley and how encouraged I was to know that Jorge Posada and his family are raising awareness about Craniosynostosis. I also told them about Riley's blog in hopes they might be able to use it, or refer it to people who are struggling through the sometimes scary moments of the treatment and process of the condition..."

Read the rest of this post and exciting opportunity at http://rileyjamesfaiai.blogspot.com

Riley did it!!

2008-07-02T09:44:00.006-04:00

This week Riley finished week 2 of his speech therapy. He's doing a great job and already making lots of progress. This past week, I wanted Cameron to be there for his session so that he could see what we're trying to help his little brother with. Turns out, Cameron is going to be THE biggest help to Riley. Cameron understands Riley better than I do, sometimes, and usually knows exactly what he wants or gets upset about. The good thing about this is, Cameron has a very big vocabulary, and will be able to help Riley as he naturally talks his way through EVERYTHING he does! Cameron's intuitiveness in this way can also be a hindrance to Riley, though. When Cameron knows what Riley wants, he doesn't usually tell Riley what the words are that he should be using, he just naturally gives Riley whatever he's non-verbally asking for. That won't help his speech develop at all!

So, when Ms. Margaret was playing with Riley this week, she'd get Cameron involved by telling him to repeat every word she says as Riley moves around doing certain things. When Riley tried to open the toy box... Ms. Margaret would keep it closed, look at Riley and say "OPEN BOX". Then She'd tell Cameron to say "OPEN BOX", and when he did, she'd open it. Riley started picking up on the idea after a few tries. A lot of his speech issues aren't really speech issues at all, I'm realizing. It's really more about control in those times. When me, or Ms. Margaret, or Krystle would say a word for Riley to repeat, he'd kind of squirm all over the place as if to tell us he didn't want to say it. But...most of the time, as soon as Cameron said a word, Riley would repeat it immediately. When Riley finally gets a word out he gets lots of cheers and hugs, and then on his own he goes around and usually gives us high fives! We also encourage Cameron and tell him that he's doing a VERY good job at helping his brother learn his words!

Needless to say, Cameron has been very proud of himself since that day, and he understands completely that he is his baby brother's helper! So...for the rest of the week, Cameron has been doing a GREAT job at teaching Riley the words of whatever he's doing. And still, when Riley says a word, and Cameron tells me excitedly, Riley knows to RUN over to me with a BIG smile for a high five and a hug!

Today, though, as smart as I know Cameron is...I was reminded that he is still only three years old!! The boys were playing together nicely, and I was watching and listening to Cameron affirm everything Riley said...and did! Here's a few things Riley was praised for by Cameron this morning... (keep in mind, each of these were followed by high fives and hugs!)

1. "YAY RILEY!! MOM, RILEY JUST SAID 'CEREAL'!!!! "

2. "GOOD JOB RILEY!!! MOM, RILEY JUST SAID 'EAT'!!!""

3. "YAY RILEY!! MOM, RILEY JUST BURPED!!!"

4. "GOOD JOB RILEY! MOM, RILEY JUST RAN IN A CIRCLE BY HIMSELF!!"

5. "YES, RILEY!!! MOM! RILEY JUST HICCUPED!"

I don't want to downplay his accomplishments, obviously...but BURPING?! Come on, Cameron!

Very proud of my crazy boys!
Find out more about Riley's Journey with Craniosynostosis HERE.

SYTYCD - Bleeding Love

2008-06-28T22:17:00.002-04:00

I haven't watched much of So You Think You Can Dance this season. Mostly because I'm not home to watch it, but also because I LOVE Randy Jackson's America's Next Best Dance Crew, and would rather watch that if I had the chance. However, as I flipped through channels this week, I learned that one of the numbers on So You Think You Can Dance was danced to Leona Lewis' "Bleeding Love". Since I like the song, I decided to find the dance on You Tube. I'm SOOOO glad I did. This is probably the most creative, passionate hip hop routine of it's kind that I've seen anywhere. Sooo Good.

Check it out.

Cameron Says...

2008-06-26T13:03:00.003-04:00

This has been really the only reoccurring post that has stayed consistent here on TOC. I think it might just be because Cameron says crazy things so...consistently.

In attempts to FINALLY put an end to the over night bed wetting, I've come up with a story (my own "mom myth") to tell Cameron. I tell him every time he goes potty in his pants he grows a few inches shorter. And every time he uses the toilet like a big boy, he gets taller and more grown up. So...if he keeps going potty in his pants, he's going to turn back into a baby, and have to wear diapers again.

This has worked for the most part. Today was an exception, when Cameron said:

Cameron: "Mommy, I have to tell you the truth."

Me: "What, Cameron?"

Cameron: "I went pee in my pants, mom."

Me: "CAMERON!! When is this going to END?!"

Cameron: "I don't know, mom. Do I look shorter."

Me: "YES! You just keep getting shorter! I better go buy some diapers!!"

I walked out of the living room to go finish folding clothes in my room. He knew I was frustrated with him. About 5 minutes later, Cameron came in and said he wanted to tell me something else.

Me: "What?! Did you change your pants and put new underwear on?"

Cameron: "Yes, mom. And guess what?!"

Me (turning to look at him): "What?"

Cameron: "I'm really really really really really not going to pee in my pants any more mom, because now my nakie listens to me. And now I am listening to my nakie."

Me: "Ok, Cameron. I'm glad you've got control over that thing now."

Cameron: "Yes mom, and I'm going to be REALLY tall someday, huh mom?!"

Me: "Yes, bud. REALLY tall."

Ramblings of this 26 year old's brain at 3:25AM

2008-06-25T03:23:00.003-04:00

In attempts to get some better rest, I've decided to post the thoughts racing around in my brain tonight (this early morning).

1. Holy Crap!! I'm pretty sure God brought me here to bless me with the closest, most amazing friends in the world. We're together almost everyday, and we're trying hard to get sick of each other's company...it just ain't gonna happen anytime soon!

2. So glad I got to officially introduce Ashlee to the team. I was nervous at first, just because I didn't want her newly graduated, out of high school mind to be corrupted by the...um...certain "edge" that characterizes us, "ballers". She did a great job, and everyone gladly welcomed her in. I knew they would.

3. I REALLY need to minimize the number of my weekly meetings. Wouldn't want to cut out any lead, launch or creative team meetings, but a few of the meetings in between need to be cut.

4. My throat hurts. And I know it's because I've been sleeping with the fan on. If it wasn't so stinkin' HOT in this house all the time...GEEZ.

5. I'm really thankful for Mara Wooten. She's Riley's service coordinator. The one in charge of making sure Riley gets all the help he needs. She came to Riley's appointment today and sat in on his entire hearing and vision testing. Like 2 and a half hours worth of watching Riley try his hardest to complete an accurate evaluation. It's such a good feeling to know that Mara cares about my boy and not just her paycheck.

6. Speaking of... every day, I'm thinking more and more about what kind of developmental delays Riley will face as he gets older. It easy for him to communicate (in his own way) around our home, but when he gets older and needs to sit in classrooms at school, I'm afraid he'll struggle. That is, unless God answers my BIG prayer in healing my boy before he enters school.

7. I LOVE the new southern phrases I'm learning. My favorite this month is "Might could". Everyone around me says it, but I don't think it's a term I'll inherit. It just sounds sooo SOUTHERN. But who knows, the longer I'm here, the better the chance I might could start using it in my everyday sentences. (Post to come: Favorite Southern Phrases)

8. I CAN'T BELIEVE Cameron fell asleep at 5PM last night, and is sleeping all the way till morning. He had a LONG play day with his buddy Kai. I'm so glad he finally has a boy his age he can play with pretty much everyday of the week. He's been in desperate need of a friend like Kai. He left so many behind in SD.

9. We were supposed to play our first tournament softball game on Monday night. The other team never showed up, so they had to forfeit. I guess the team looked at their schedule wrong, and misread the time of the game. They called parks and rec, and somehow arranged to play us tonight. We had to scramble to get a team together today which was difficult. We ended up playing without 3 of our best players, and we got worked. The umpire told us that we needed to call and protest the game in the morning, since their game should have counted as a forfeit the day before. So...we're protesting in the morning. Hopefully we get to play tonight. I REALLY...REALLY want that game back.

10. I really need to get back to sleep. I think I'll try to take some theraflu for my throat, and to make me sleepy...except, I'm already sweating and a steamy cup of theraflu would only make me more uncomfortable. Hopefully now that I have these things written down, and off my mind, I'll be able conk out.

Good Night (at 4:17AM)!

Good Times...

2008-06-22T19:13:00.005-04:00

I often reflect on the days, not so long ago when I was in high school, and nothing else mattered besides making sure each class was fun and interesting. I found an old high school friend on facebook a couple days ago! We reminisced on our crazy days back then and she told me she had a picture of us in high school. When I went to check it out, I just about FELL OVER laughing at the memories that immediately flooded my mind!

This is Me, Laura and Jessika in Mr. Lyons 11th grade math class.
Mr. Lyons was a nice guy. He was pretty old fashioned and got frustrated easily when any of us would disrupt class.

I'll never forget, one time, when me Laura, Jessika and Matt were chatting during class. We were supposed to be doing class work, but that was boring, so we decided that drawing pictures and sharing them with each other would be more fun. Well... Mr. Lyons apparently had enough of our chatting, at which point he made his way over to our table. We had all of our chairs conveniently turned towards each other and from behind my back Mr. Lyons snuck up, and smacked his papers on my desk. The class got quiet. So did we. I was kind of concerned about what would happen next since I already got a referral in the same week (for ditching, I think?). The words that came out of Mr. Lyons mouth next, were ones that I'll NEVER forget! Here was our exchange -

Mr. Lyons (looking in our direction and VERY LOUD): "WHAT IS ALL OF THIS RAZZ MATAZZ RIGAMAROLE? I MEAN, WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!"

The class was still silent waiting to see what else would come from the wrath of our obviously fuming mad math teacher.

Me and Laura immediately started laughing under our breath. That's when I responded to Mr. Lyons.

Me: "What did you just say?! What were those words you just said?"

Mr. Lyons: "I said KNOCK OFF the RIGAMAROLE...NOW."

Me: "What in the HECK are you talking about, Mr. Lyons?, and what was that other word?"

At this point the rest of the class is still quiet, but we are BUSTING UP LAUGHING. I knew he was pissed...but I had NEVER heard those words in my life and the way he used them was so funny!

Me: "Are those real words, Mr. Lyons? I mean, REALLY?"

Mr. Lyons: "You and Laura go get the dictionary and look the words up if you really don't know what they mean."

So, we grabbed the dictionary, looked up the words and there they were!! I still don't know what they mean.

We gave that man SO much grief, but we definitely brought life into his classroom, and I know he loved us for that!!

Laura - If you read this, feel free to push back on content details! I'm sure there were things I left out!!

Good times!

Hostess with the Mostess

2008-06-22T07:02:00.003-04:00

Many of you know that a few months ago, I started hostessing events at the event center next to our church office. So far I have hostessed a Barmitzvah and two wedding receptions. This is my favorite job EVER! It's a blast to be around and serve people who are in CELEBRATION mode! People LOVE to party, and so do I, so it's a great fit for me!! One of the greatest benefits of working these events is when people share food with me! Usually I'll make really good friends with the caterer, and they'll bring food to my desk. But sometimes, like last night...it's not so easy. I was VERY VERY helpful to the caterer last night. The catering company was very nice, however, they must not have realized by my emaciated torso that I hadn't eaten all day.

I knew this was going to be a problem. There was NO WAY I was going to ask any one for food! I mean, I wasn't even invited to their reception. I'm just supposed to just be helping them out. After a few hours, in all of their busy-ness and partying, NOBODY realized that I was hungry.

So I needed a plan. I thought about how I could introduce myself casually to the bride and groom... hmm...I could do that. Then if I start talking with their family (specifically their parents) I'd certainly be invited to the head table, for sure. I figured, if I was going to be at the head table, I probably needed to give a toast.

It worked great. You can hear my toast, here!

All this really means was that the event pretty much ran itself last night, and I had too much time on my hands. I really need to pack a lunch next time.

Holy Moly!!!

2008-06-21T15:25:00.002-04:00

Brought to you, by weather.com - San Diego hits a sweltering 108 today at noon! Drink lots of water, friends! And then go run naked in the sprinklers or something!

Happiest Day of the Year!

2008-06-20T11:36:00.006-04:00

"An equation that measures happiness has allowed a mathematician to determine that today is the happiest day of the year, due in part to the length of evenings, proportion of outdoor activities and nice weather, and the first day of summer and its association with positive childhood memories."

This is the big talk on Google Trends today. I naturally took a few moments this morning to wonder if today felt like the happiest day of the year for ME! And although there are still many days left in the year, today is a very happy day indeed!

Somehow, my wimp of a brain often decides that happiness is determined by whether or not all my bills are paid, with money left over in the bank. I might as well face the fact that I'll NEVER be "happy", if that's the case. Thankfully it's not. I love it when God gives me peace in the midst of my insecurities. Money is definitely an insecurity of mine. And thankfully God still provides, even when my faith is... well...not faith!

For some reason, this morning, I didn't wake up thinking about money, or my computer, or all the things I had to get done before the day ended. I actually woke up energized to start my day, even as the kids were already bouncing off the walls at 6:30AM. Maybe it was the warm weather and "long days", or "childhood memories" and "outdoor activities". I'm not sure. Here are some things that I know for a fact make today happy!

I'm so happy to be able to wake up in the morning laying next to my husband, who's my best friend. I'm so thankful for him and the risks he takes in order to follow God and provide for our family.

I'm so happy about the friends I've made from the softball team I found on CRAIGSLIST!
I met with Christian today. And as she shared about how she felt God put me in their lives, I couldn't help but to feel like it was the other way around. God brought me here to give Christian and Kelly to ME. We also talked about how it feels like we've known each other forever. Sometimes I totally forget that I've only known them for 3 months! I couldn't have asked God to put me in community with a better group of friends!! They're definitely more awesome than what I ever prayed for.

I'm so happy that God CHOSE us to be part of Church at the Triangle. He could have chosen ANYONE, but He chose us. I think anyone who leaves family and friends, leaves with reluctancy (new word?). As much as I wish I could be close to home, there's truly nothing like the feeling of riding in the center of the wave of God's will. The sweet spot. We've never experienced that like we're experiencing it now.

A couple of other reasons today is the happiest day of my year:

1. The receptionist at Riley's speech therapists office, who I've been talking to for a few weeks recognized my email address and had heard about Church at the Triangle. She just happened to know Lee and Carla very well, and...SURPRISE... her family is looking for a church! That happens to one of us every day!

2. We had a great meeting with our launch team today! It's sooo awesome to be around people who are just as excited about launching our church as we are!

3. Riley starts speech therapy on Monday! I can't believe that we're getting all of this help for free! Seriously. It's like having doctors coming to my house every week to make my son better, and it's not costing us anything. We don't even have to go through insurance like I thought we might have to. Riley has a very promising future, in that his weaknesses are treatable. But they're just significant enough to make us eligible for all the help he needs.

4. Lee and Carla get home from the beach tomorrow! YEAH!! We have a lot to catch up on! Let's go to coffee, C!

5. Heather, Kevin, Kalia, Kai and Peyton get here on SUNDAY!!! These guys sold their business, and their house, just to come to Raleigh to be part of CATT!! I'm so stoked for them to come on board, and I'm even more happy that Cameron will have a buddy to play with every day!

Finally, this is my favorite reason why today is the happiest day of the year:

My boys are happy boys in every moment that they get to spend together! Especially in the shower!

WWW SPLURGE

2008-06-19T00:00:00.001-04:00

There are a few websites I check every day. I'm not necessarily proud of my impulsive internet info gathering habit, but I decided I'd share my favorites anyway!

1. google.com/trends
Find out what the top google searches are every hour. I check this every morning. This site allows me to find out big news headlines usually before they're aired on television or in print.

2. stufffchristianslike.com
I forgot where I even found this guys blog, but it's definitely one of my favorites. John Acuff is a Christian, and he writes on his blog about all of the quirky things Christians do, in and out of church. The dude is pretty funny, and most of the time, he's right on.

3. kgtv.com
I like to check San Diego's 10 news website every day just to keep up on their local headlines. The real reason I check it is so my parents can't surprise me with any Padre game scores or headlines about drunk mayors found passed out on the sidewalk.

4. wral.com
Local Raleigh news headlines

5. bloglines.com
Bloglines is where all the blogs I subscribe to are listed. When I visit the site, I can find out when any one of those blogs has a new post.

6. scrabulous.com
Ok...I don't visit this one EVERY day, but I visit it quite a bit! Challenge your friends in an online game of scrabble!

7. twitter.com
Keeping y'all updated!

8. weather.com
Since the weather in Raleigh is sometimes unpredictable, I like to visit this site where I can get an hour by hour breakdown of the weather in my day! Very helpful and accurate.

Days Go By...

2008-06-18T00:00:00.000-04:00

This past week, we were able attend an awesome graduation party for Lee and Carla's oldest daughter, Ashlee. Lee recently wrote a post about how fast time went by from when Ashlee was born until now as she has finished this season of her life. One of the lessons Lee mentioned on his blog was "don't wait until the big moment (graduation day) to gather your memories."

This prompted me to search through the pictures I have on my computer and find the ones of my boys from when they were born until now. Even just looking through pictures made me realize how fast time has already gone by. I miss little baby feet and being able to rock my babies to sleep, and today I was able to relive a few of those moments. Enjoy.

Big as a house with number one!

First time momma!

Second time momma!

Brand New Cameron Lee!

Brand new Riley James!

Cameron learning early! (Did he learn that on PBS kids?)

Riley in swing!

Cameron, my "punkin"!

I miss...

goofy smiles!

The way Cameron wobbled around in his cast!

I even miss his binky. I used to HATE it back then.

My CHUBBS!!

Time with cam at the beach...while prego with Riley James.

The day Cameron became a big brother!

I love my little beach bum!

...and I love my bald boys!

I hope they're best buds forever!

I love my sweet boys!

Staring ME in the face.

2008-06-17T00:00:00.000-04:00

Moving away from everything and everyone I've ever known has forced me to take a closer look at who I am. In lonely times, in happy satisfied moments, or in just busy seasons of work and ministry, all that matters is that who I am reflects who Jesus is. That's no easy task. In fact, it isn't a task at all. It's more of a natural result of a natural progression. I truly believe that the more I seek God, the more I'll know Him. And the more I know God, the more I'll love Him. And the more I love God, the more I'll care about the the things He cares about... and when all that happens, I think I'll be on the right track to becoming the woman God created me to be.

Lately, in a few leadership blogs I subscribe to, I've come across many articles on character. There are so many that have struck a chord in me, but here are a few from Andy Stanley that have impacted me the most.

1. You can lead without character... But character is what makes you a leader worth following.

2. Character is the will to do what’s right even when it’s hard.

3. Your accomplishments as a leader will make your name known, but your character will determine what people associate with your name.

4. The irony of being a leader with character is that your willingness to do what is right may jeopardize your forward momentum.

5. Character is not made in crisis; it is only exhibited.

One more blogworthy mention on character -
Before interviewing for my first job out of high school, my dad gave me some great advice about character. I'll never forget it. I think I remember having a list of all of my "skills" and experience written out on a piece of paper. As I was listing them off to my dad, he stopped me and said, "all those things are great, Lauren...your people skills, your computer skills, your willingness to learn are awesome, but what you need to tell your future boss is that above all else, you CARE about your reputation and your character." Ever since then, whenever anyone has ever told me I shouldn't care what people think about me, I feel a conviction in the core of my stinkin' soul! I ABSOLUTELY care about what people think of me. I care that my character is reflecting God's heart.

Here's me and Riley contemplating "character". Not really. But...I thought it was cute. This was our talk on the curb outside, watching the sunset in our jammies before bedtime.

Offline.

2008-06-16T00:00:00.000-04:00

I'll be taking a break from my computer this week. That means no ichat, no Skype, no Twitter and no email. Call or text if you need to reach me! I've pre-written posts to go live here everyday I'm offline (so my mom has something to read)! I'll be back online, hopefully less impulsively, on Sunday, June 22nd!

Some things I'm planning on getting done in my computerless week:

1. Cleaning out my cupboards.
2. Cleaning every baseboard in the house.
3. Organizing my husbands books.
4. Walks each day with the kids.
5. Fill out more paperwork for Riley's therapy.
6. Clean out my closet, put all cold weather clothes away.
7. Kiss my boys... like every moment of the day.
8. Read 2 books. (they're both short)
9. Write out service order for the weekend
10. Take the boys to the library.

My Dad and Me

2008-06-14T20:00:00.000-04:00

Since it's father's day and since my dad is a faithful favorite to The Other Cause, I dedicated my portion of cyberspace to celebrate him today.

I love my dad! In so many ways, I'm just like him! I got a little bit of his sarcastic humor, and a good dose of his dorkiness (Lindsay would agree with that). But, besides those things, my dad has given me so many awesome memories that I like to remember often. Most of those memories have to do with softball games and tournaments. Some are culdesac parties and neighborhood holiday gatherings. Trips to Yosemite and to our cabin in the desert. I could go on. As I reflect on past great memories with my dad, I've realized one of my GREATEST passions in life is something my dad instilled in me.

My constant desire to be with and around people, living immersed in community is because that's really the only way I've ever done life! I can't remember one vacation we ever took without people with us (besides our trip to Europe, which was a gift). Whether it was a neighborhood party or a family trip somewhere far away, we always had people with us. Before blue-tooth and wireless cell phones, my dad had a CB radio. It was a two way radio thing with a HUGE antenna we'd strap on to the top of our Bronco. We'd use it on road trips and stay in constant dialogue with whoever we were vacationing with. So fun! After softball games, my parents would invite everyone over to our house to just hang out! Our family always held holiday parties for everyone we knew, and me, my sister and brother would have friends over constantly. I don't think my parents EVER got tired of community. My dad's way of getting his mind off of work and just chilling out is hanging with people he loves. Maybe that's just an extrovert thing, but whatever it is, I have it too.

I love people, so much... and I credit that part of my being to my dad. He's taught me so much about celebrating others more than myself. It's no wonder to me why he picked "Shower the People" by James Taylor for our father daughter dance on my wedding day. And it's no wonder why he started his speech that day by talking about how incredibly moving it was to have all the people we love so dearly all gathered under one roof. That was powerful to him. It was powerful for me.

Thanks, dad, for making other's first in our family. I'm living the life you taught me to live, and I couldn't be more proud, thankful or happy about my passion for people.

I love you, happy father's day, to the most selfless person I know!

Cameron Says...

2008-06-12T14:54:00.000-04:00

He knows that when he doesn't finish dinner, he doesn't get dessert.

This made Cameron pretty sad for the rest of the night until he went to bed. After a bit of arguing and whining, Cameron realized we weren't giving him dessert no matter how hard he asked, so he walked (like a poor child who has never eaten a meal in his life)back to his room and into bed.

About 10 minutes later, Cameron came out into the front where Steve and I were catching up on our favorite shows. This is pretty much a nightly routine and takes about 4 times of physically putting him back into his bed before he actually falls asleep. So, like normal, when we saw him sneak around the corner, we told him to "GO TO BED". Instead of going back to bed, he came closer, and with a really sad face, Cameron said...

"Um...Mommy and Daddy? I have to tell you something."

Me: "What Cameron?! You need to GO TO BED."

Cameron: "I know, mom, but I have to tell you something."

Me: "What?"

Cameron: "I don't feel so good about this."

Me: "You don't feel so good about what?"

Cameron: "I don't feel so good about living here with you guys."

Me: "What do you mean, Cameron?"

Cameron: "I don't think I should live here with you guys anymore. I need to go live with my grandma and grandpa."

Me: (with lots of sadness in my voice) "Cameron, do you understand how much we'd miss you?"

Cameron: "Yes, mom, I know. But you can come see me at the hotel when I come to visit you guys."

Me: "Ok, we'll talk about it later, Cameron. Go to sleep buddy. We love you."

Cameron: "I love you too, mom and dad."

My sister made this for me a while back, as a joke. I thought it was pretty fitting for this post... and maybe not too far from Cameron's reality.

Who Screams for Ice Cream?!

2008-06-07T17:47:00.000-04:00

I found these pictures that Christian took, on her blog. We took the boys to ice cream yesterday. Since I needed to do a Target run, I figured I could accomplish two things in one stop! Cool thing about that is ice cream in Target's cafe is way cheaper than any other ice cream place and my kids can't tell the difference between Dryers and Cold Stone! We got ice cream for all of us (I shared with Riley) for under 3 bucks! Can't beat it! Just thought I'd share the great experience with all my mommy friends in San Diego!

I think I could make a hobby out of taking pictures toddlers and their ice cream!
Love it!

Riley's Journey - NEW DEVELOPMENTS

2008-06-03T17:42:00.000-04:00

Today Riley was evaluated for the early intervention program here in Raleigh. Find out how he scored and what steps we're taking next by visiting http://rileyjamesfaiai.blogspot.com/

http://stevefaiai.wordpress.com/

2008-06-02T12:23:00.000-04:00

Here's an excerpt from Steve's new blog, Audience Of One, dedicated to his continual learnings and thoughts on worship.

"When we were asked to consider the possibility of moving to Raleigh, I honestly thought of it as being to good to be true and that this would be way over my head. I felt ill equipped for the task and honestly scared. However between the months of July (when we were first presented with the opportunity) and October when we made our decision, GOD was doing something within us that only He could do..."

View the rest of Steve's blog at http://stevefaiai.wordpress.com

or

Click HERE to Subscribe

Update: Steve's other blog will still be open and frequently updated.

Making Memories!?

2008-06-01T20:00:00.000-04:00

It was a warm beautiful evening! A perfect night for me and Krystle to take the kids to Frankies. Steve got a ride with a friend to youth group where he was leading worship. So, me and Krystle packed up the kids and headed out. After about 45 minutes of ticket winning fun, we decided to leave and take the kids to dinner and ice cream. As we approached the automatic sliding doors to leave Frankies, we were quite surprised to see that a huge thunder storm moved in. It was POURING rain, thundering, lightening...the whole deal. We waited a little while for the storm to die down, but it didn't look like the clouds were going anywhere, so I decided to run out into the rain, through the parking lot to get the car. I got to the car, hopped in, turned the key only to find out the battery died. I'm not sure how it died, but it did. The ignition didn't click when I turned the key, the lights didn't turn on when I tried them and the car still didn't start even after I did a little dance in the front seat.

Hmm?! I suddenly went into MACGYVER mode. Yeah, um...that didn't work. I called Steve, but he didn't answer his phone. I knew I could have asked someone for a jump, but all the people who were near us looked like they might jump ME! So, I walked back over to Krystle (she had the boys) and told her the unfortunate news. We decided to walk to the car and sit there until we could get a hold of Steve. Once we finally did, we realized he couldn't really do anything to help until he went to the store to get a battery. I didn't want to sit in the car and wait for him because both boys were getting tired and whiny.

Suddenly, there was a break in the clouds! I looked at Krystle and said "Let's go. We're gonna walk home!" Our house is about a mile away from Frankies, so I knew we could do it! It was just a matter of getting there before it started raining again. So we rolled up our jeans, I carried Riley, Krystle grabbed Cameron's hand, and we were off! We were barely out of the parking lot when it started POURING and LIGHTENING and THUNDERING all around us. Our only place to find cover was under the trees around us. But, because of all the lightening, I didn't think that would have been the smartest idea. So...I took Riley's shirt off (thankfully it was still 85 degrees outside) and put it over his head so that he wouldn't get an ear infection! My flipflops were really slippery, so I decided to take them off. We started walking faster, but there was NO WAY the rain was going to stop in the time it took us to get to the house. I didn't have time to think of a better idea because we were soaking and pretty much stuck...so we walked as fast as we could (Cameron is slow and loves rain puddles). It wasn't too long after that, a small little car pulled up next to us, and a lady driver rolled down her window to ask if we wanted a ride. I thought about my other options and the safety of my boys, and told the lady I didn't have car seats. Then I started telling her our whole story. Before I could finish telling her about Riley's craniosynostosis, she interrupted and said "Girl, just get in the car! It's POURING!" So we got in. The boys were nervous and quiet. I thanked her until we pulled up to the house. We got home safely and dried off the boys.

After we all calmed down,Cameron got a really sad look on his face and tears started rolling. "What's the matter, Cameron?" I asked. He was so upset that it was hard for him to gather the words he was about to say. Finally, he painfully expressed "I just really really miss our car, mom. I loved that car." He was under the impression the whole time that we'd left the car and we'd never see it again. Once I reassured him that daddy would get the car later, he wiped his tears away and felt much better.

Glad to be home, and am thankful for one good Samaritan lady named Frankelsia.
Of course...I made Krystle take a picture before we entered the house!

Definitely a memory making moment!!

My Ballers!!

2008-05-30T22:29:00.000-04:00

One blind hit on a craigslist ad 4 months ago landed me on an amazing softball team here in Raleigh. Not only is the league organized and competitive, but I'm playing with girls who just finished playing college ball! How cool is THAT?! We play 2 times a week, and practice whenever our coach thinks we need it! We've started hanging out on the weekends, and we really just enjoy each other's company!

Christian is one of my teammates! And she's an incredible softball player!! She has started coming to Church at the Triangle, and is using her expertise in PR (her real job) to help us launch our church!! She has a GREAT story, and I'm so glad I'm getting to know her! See Christians blog at http://differentkindofwalk.blogspot.com to read more about her and about our softball team!

God is doing amazing things in my life and in the life of our church, and I'm thankful today, that He brought me Christian!

GO BALLERS!

Cameron Says...

2008-05-30T04:49:00.000-04:00

This may be considered more of a "Cameron does" version of this segment today, but nonetheless, it qualified!

Cameron LOVES coming to my softball games. He asks me if it's a softball day, pretty much everyday. The reason he likes coming isn't because of the playground, or to play with other kids, and he certainly doesn't come just because he's interested in my batting average. Cameron LOVES softball game days because before almost every game we stop by the store to pick up water and one snack for him to eat at the game. Cameron loves his snacks. He usually chooses Cheeto's and a Gatorade. This snack stop is well worth his GREAT attitude throughout the rest of the evening and during my game.

Yesterday, I told him that we weren't going to stop by the store for a snack before the game, and that he should bring something from home. To my surprise, Cameron wasn't upset. He didn't whine, or even question why we weren't going to the store. Instead he replied by saying "Ok, mom, I will pack my own snack!"

As I started getting my uniform and everything together, I heard the stool being moved in the kitchen and the silverware drawer being opened and closed. A few moments later...

"Ok, I'm ready to go now, mom!" We headed out the door, and it wasn't until we got outside that I noticed what he had packed for his snack. "What is that, baby?!" I asked.

"It's a peanut butter sandwich, mom!"

It wasn't just any peanut butter sandwich though. For some reason, I guess my son prefers the heel parts of a loaf of bread, because he managed to work his way through the loaf of bread to take out both ends to make his sandwich. I thought that was kind of funny! But then, when I looked closer, the thing that amused me even more was the 1 big bite taken out of the sandwich. I guess it just looked so good when he finished making it that he couldn't resist a little taste!

He was very proud of his homemade snack. I'm proud of him too. Even though I still don't understand why he had to put the tiny sandwich inside a gigantic freezer bag. Oh well! That's my boy!

The SO CLOSE to Holy POST

2008-05-29T00:47:00.000-04:00

Oh man. I am humbled and honored to have the privilege today to present to you one of my favorite JOYS of being a resident of Raleigh, North Carolina!

Wow. Read it again! That was an AMAZING introduction!

Friends, meet Snoopy's Hot Dogs and More.

Now, let me just start by saying I am NOT a hot dog fan. They're messy, pretty boring, and just not a menu item I'd ever prefer... EXCEPT AT SNOOPY'S.

I had my first Snoopy Dog a couple months after moving here to Raleigh which just so happens to be Snoopy's original and only location. The reason I even decided to try a Snoopy's Famous Hot Dog, besides the coercion of our friends here, is because every time I drive by the place, there's a line of people wrapped around the side of the building. People of all different walks of life. Young, Old, College kids, business men... just EVERYBODY!

Ordering at Snoopy's can either be extremely easy or a little tricky. For me it's easy. When you order a Snoopy Dog, it automatically comes equipped with mustard, onions and chili on it. You can request to add slaw and or cheese, or you can request to not have any condiments. I used to think that the trick to the Snoopy dog was the chili and onions, but I recently realized that the trick, the SECRET is a medium sized contraption I always look for when I go. It's some kind of hot dog steamer. How it works? Not sure...but it makes my hot dog bun steamy hot and delicious!

It wasn't love at first sight, but after experiencing the wonderfulness that is Snoopy's, I have really NO other alternative for a fast food run!

Dinner Time at the Faiai House

2008-05-28T16:40:00.000-04:00

Every once in a while, there's nothing like a delicious bowl of hamburger helper and rice!!

Deeper.

2008-05-27T06:55:00.000-04:00

This morning I woke up thinking about deep friendships I miss in San Diego. Although I love the people we're doing life with here, I have yet to find friends I can be around and feel safe letting my guard down. (I can name certain SD friends who are probably cheering at this fact, thinking I should come home now!) Not the case! I miss you though, and I'd love to see you!

More than anything, I'm realizing the similarities between my deep friendships and my worn out softball glove. I like asking my teammates to try my glove on, because no one, NO ONE can fit it on their hand! It's pretty funny. I've had my glove since the mid 1990's, the leather inside is pretty much shredded. But...my glove fits ME perfect. In fact, it fits BETTER every time I put it on! It has taken me years and years and years to break in my softball glove to give it the perfect crease for my hand. Do I even need to explain this analogy?

I wish it didn't have to take years and years to cultivate a deep friendship, but truth is, it's going to take longer than I want it to. REALLY?! Ugh. You mean, my husband needs to suffice as my ONLY closest friend right now?! BORING! Don't get me wrong. My friendship, my marriage-ship (new word) with my hubby is my refuge! Especially now! But I miss my HIZZIES! The ones who know the hidden meaning behind the dumb things I say. The ones I can hug, and without saying a word, they can KNOW in that moment how much I care about them! The ones who I've known forever, and who know me as the same person they love me for, no matter how much I change. Did that make sense?

It wouldn't make sense or be fair to place expectations on the friendships I'm cultivating right now. I knew from the beginning exactly what I wanted my glove to feel like when I caught a ball, but it took lots of time and shaping to get it that way!

Maybe this is why my initial realization of who God is was so powerful, emotional and earth shattering for me. In ONE moment, God was everything I could desire out of a deep friendship. Actually, God was the model of what a deep friendship had the potential to be. The relationship between friends that would normally take years and years to shape, took one split moment with God.

Or maybe I'm getting this whole thing wrong. Maybe I'm waiting for a friend to meet the desires of my heart that only God wants to fulfill. Maybe God moved me all away across the country to cut me off from those friendships I've been feeding off of so that HE could have my full attention and bless me with a deeper friendship in Him. Maybe even one that's closer than a brother. Wow! That sounds like something I could look into!

I think I'll always long for depth in my friendships. And, I'm ok with that! But for now, while I'm aching for deeper friends, I'm going to ask God to fill that throb in my soul with His intended love for me, that I've possibly put in second place. Ouch...try admitting that one!

Here are some of the friends I miss, and some words worth listening to in my short moment of clarity.

Lindsay Jo

2008-05-24T15:23:00.000-04:00

Lindsay is definitely one of my favorite people on the planet. When we were younger we fought like drama queens! Except for when we'd carve pumpkins together!

As we've grown older, our love for each other has grown tremendously too! I think she loves me mostly because I birthed her nephews!! Anyway...today, in honor of her 25th birthday, I wanted to list some of the MANY things I admire most about my sister Lindsay!

- Lindsay is the most selfless person I know. She doesn't try to be a caring trusting person, she just IS!

- Lindsay lives a life of no compromise. She stands up for what she believes is right, and doesn't waver in the things she's passionate about. (This means, she calls me 50 times on the day of the NC primaries to make sure I VOTE!)

- To Lindsay, CREATIVITY itself is out of style. She's her own trend setter and has always been on the cutting edge of art and design.

- On Christmas and other holidays, Lindsay makes us personal gifts. They're not lame either. She's made me a few wall hangings and stuffed animals for the boys!

- Lindsay is unconditional. Whether you've screwed her over, stolen her latest fashion concept or have known her forever, Lindsay will be your friend! And she'll love you unconditionally.

My favorite thing about my sister is all of the memories we have together.
Some of my favorites:
-Rats in the Attic Attic

- Uhh Shoot

- Mom and Dad's Anniversary Song

- Visiting her and my mom on the set of Titanic

- Listening to her sing the Yeah yeah yeah's (or whatever they're called) in the car

- Family Cameltoe Hairdo

- When dad picked you up by your hair

- Making fun of Landon's "Oh MY GOD, MOM...Do you WANT me to flunk my test tomorrow? She's helping me with my HOMEWORK".

- Carquest Coast to Coast Guarantee

Lindsay, I LOVE you and miss you a ton! So do my boys! Hope to see you soon!
Happy 25th Birthday!

Here's me and my sis getting our haircut not so long ago!

Here she is with her boyfriend, Buzzy!

And here's her Obama cake!

Definitely queen of the power tools!

If you think Lindsay is as AWESOME as I think she is, and if you really want to give her a gift for her birthday, but can't make it out to Portland any time soon, check out maplexo.com and buy a bunch of her jewelry made from recycled skateboards. Or just look for it in your local skate shop!

Landon Post Op Update

2008-05-23T09:37:00.000-04:00

Landon got home from the hospital at about 3:30PM yesterday (Thursday). Aside from some pain at the site of his incision, he's doing much better. Thanks to all who prayed and especially to all the family and friends who came to the hospital to be with Landon when my parents couldn't be there with him.

Glad you're feeling better, bubba. Don't addict yourself to painkillers!

Everyone loves pictures...right?!

2008-05-22T23:11:00.000-04:00

Cameron and his grandma.

Cameron dancing, waiting for lunch.

Visit with Mom and Dad

2008-05-22T16:08:00.000-04:00

Although their trip home was a bit of a disaster, we had a great time with my mom and dad in town. I think most people would be absolutely ready for their parents to leave after visiting for 5 days. That wasn't our case. Time went by very quickly and we were sad to see them go.

Big hugs for grandpa...

Riley helping his grandpa keep up on his work.

Kisses for grandma.

More kisses for grandma!

The dreaded goodbye. So glad you got this depressing picture, dad!

A day in the life of a Faiai boy

2008-05-22T01:13:00.000-04:00

I'm noticing a pattern in Cameron and Riley's morning routine. Here's a little sneak peek.
At about 6:30AM both boys (Riley learns from Cameron) move the bar stools from the dining area into the kitchen to make themselves breakfast. If you look closely, you can see boy on the right chose ice cream cones for breakfast. Boy on the left decided on jelly beans.

After getting them out of the kitchen and taking their idea of breakfast away, the boys usually get a little angry, but are ok watching cartoons while I make them real food. But... sometimes watching cartoons isn't enough to keep their attention... and then I can almost bet when I peek around the corner I'll find Riley trying to escape.

After breakfast and a couple of changes of clothes, they enjoy playing together in their pirate ship.

Riley pretty much copies every single sound and movement his big brother makes.

This week was special, because we were all sad that grandma and grandpa had to leave. So, we made a special trip to Frankie's where Cameron got to race cars with daddy against mommy. Can you take a guess who won? Yes. Cameron. But after I mentioned that I lost and he won, I was reassured that "We're ALL winner's" so I'm not too sad.

So, there it is. A day in the life of a Faiai boy. Of course, that was only the first half of the day. Post nap time is a completely different experience. I'll fill you in on how that goes later!

Craziness

2008-05-21T08:18:00.000-04:00

My parents were at the airport since yesterday (Tuesday) trying to find an earlier flight home so they could get to the hospital where my brother was having an emergency appendectomy. The couldn't find any earlier flights, so they boarded their originally intended flight at 4PM. 4PM was about the time my television started buzzing the emergency broadcast system alert, when we learned of a severe thunderstorm was headed our way. My dad called me at 5:30PM to tell me he was still in Raleigh. They didn't make it off the runway before the storm. And the airport where they switched planes (Charlotte) wasn't taking any flights, so they got off the plane and spent the rest of the night trying to figure out how to get home. They eventually made it to Charlotte after the storm, but couldn't leave from there until this morning. They tried to find a hotel to sleep in, but they were all booked, so they spent the night in the airport. My dad sent me this picture this morning.

The earliest flight they could find was one to Vegas this morning. From there, they'll catch another plane back to SD.

Update on Landon:
I don't know much. Just bits and pieces from my grandparents and my aunt who have been at the hospital with him. The doctor's were still performing xrays yesterday morning to make sure it was his appendix and not some other issue. They performed the appendectomy and removed his appendix yesterday afternoon. He was in a ton of pain after he woke up from his anesthesia. That's all I know. Not sure if he's in pain because of the incision or if his pain might be caused by something else, and not the appendix. I don't know. We'll see. I'm trying to get a hold of Landon's girlfriend, Beth, who's been there with him since he went in 2 days ago.

My Bro...

2008-05-20T08:07:00.000-04:00

My little brother, Landon went to the emergency room last night thinking he had another kidney stone (he's had three). My grandparents have been at the hospital with him since 4pm yesterday, and they just learned that Landon ruptured his appendix and that it's going to be removed today. My parents are going to the airport now to find an immediate flight home. Please pray for my brother, the surgery and that my kids won't freak out that their grandma and grandpa are leaving much earlier today than planned.

Thanks.

Cameron Says...

2008-05-19T21:34:00.000-04:00

My mom and dad leave tomorrow. The week went by incredibly fast. I'm sad they're leaving and so are my kids. More on their visit later. For now, a conversation Cameron and I had about his grandma and grandpa just before bedtime.

Cameron: Mom, I'm really going to miss my grandma and grandpa.

Me: I know, buddy. Grandma and Grandpa are my mommy and daddy. I'm going to miss them too.

Cameron: I wished they could live in Norf Carolina by our house.

Me: Well, maybe if you pray about it, God might make their hearts want to move here someday.

Cameron: But mom!!

Me: What?

Cameron: They can't push their house all the way over here.

Me: You're right. They'd have to leave their house and find a new one here.

Cameron: Wait!! I know, Mom! They can live in the apartment right next to the wall of my bedroom!

Me: That would be PERFECT!

They're Here!!

2008-05-15T06:47:00.000-04:00

My parents finally landed in Raleigh at about 6:10PM last night. The boys were so excited to see them. I was excited too! Grandma brought TONS of gifts for her grandbabies and we had a great first few hours together eating dinner and watching idol! Cameron spent the night at their hotel last night, and is VERY excited about waking up early and enjoying the hotel's continental breakfast! We have a full day/week ahead of us, starting at 9:00AM this morning!

Here's a picture we took at the airport just after they arrived. The boys had fun holding their sign as grandma and grandpa came down the escalator into baggage claim.

My Boys, My Responsibility

2008-05-12T21:17:00.000-04:00

I don't know why, but, In the past year or so, I've done a lot of thinking about what kind of young men Cameron and Riley will be when they're in high school. Weird, I know. But every so often, some random moment will trigger these thoughts!

The latest came from a quote from one of my all time favorite blogs.

"When you have a boy, you have to worry about one boy on the planet. When you have a girl, you have to worry about every boy on the planet."

I'd have to agree with this comment, however, I couldn't say that I'm content with my role in this statement if it's true!

Watching my little bro grow up into a teenager and now an adult has given me an insight that I'm pretty sure is speaking into my growing concern!

I'm pretty sure Landon (my 19 year old brother) has ALWAYS had more GIRL friends than GUY friends. Looking back at his past 4 years in high school, I'm actually glad this was true. He was never part of any of the druggie groups his guy friends were in, and was never really a bully like a lot of them were. Since he had more GIRL friends, he always did a good job at maintaining a cool, pretty calm and respectful composure. And I always did a good job at telling him to "MAKE GOOD CHOICES" before he went anywhere! I'm convinced, he's a good guy!

But...no matter how GOOD he is, as long as he's dating someone's daughter, he's inevitably going to be the firing target of a protective dad. I'm pretty sure almost any dad would initially like to ring the neck of his daughters love interests. And to an extent, that's understandable!

What this all means is...I'm not sure how good I feel about my sons being the source of some paranoid dad's anger some day !! That's just not fair! To them OR me!! Even if I raise the most respectful, purest boys in the world, they're still going to be glared upon someday. And...on the flip side of that, I'm going to be the one responsible for their actions if they do screw up. I know for a fact that the daughters of these protective dads aren't always innocent. In fact, SHE was probably the one who ASKED my son to make out in the first place, Mr. WHOEVER YOU ARE!

(sigh)... Anyway. Maybe I shouldn't get all worked up about this whole deal yet. I could probably wait AT LEAST until they stop peeing in their Handy Manny underwear!

Holmes Visit Countdown!

2008-05-12T20:38:00.000-04:00

In about 48 hours, I'll be hugging my mom and dad!! Yeah!!!
I've never been more excited to see them!

To celebrate their near arrival, Here are a few reasons I can't wait for them to get here! In no particular order, of course!

I can't wait for Cameron and Riley to see their grandma and grandpa!

I can't wait to play scrabble with them!

I can't wait until they get to hear all of the crazy stuff the boys say!

I can't wait for my dad to make beans and Carne Asada!

I can't wait until they come watch my game!

I can't wait until they get to see our church building!

I can't wait for them to meet our friends!

I can't wait until our road trip on Monday to the beach!

I can't wait to show them around town!

I can't wait until they see the bobcats!

I just can't wait!!

Cameron Says...

2008-05-11T18:36:00.000-04:00

I might make this a reoccurring segment of my blog. The boy doesn't stop talking!

Our latest conversation -

(Today, walking home from the grocery store)

Me: "CAMERON! What is that big wet spot on your pants? Did you have an accident?"

Cameron: "No Mom, don't worry. It's not pee. It's just a fish crying."

Me: "Oh! So there's a fish crying in your pants?"

Cameron: "Mom, let's just not talk about it."

---------------------------------------------------

A PICTURE FOR GRANDMA AND GRANDPA!
Mom, he said this was a picture of you and grandpa on your way to our house!!
I thought it was a pretty good drawing for my crazy 3 year old!

You can even click it and print it if you want to hang it on your refrigerator!

Mazel Tov!

2008-05-11T01:38:00.000-04:00

About a week ago, I was offered a job as a hostess for the event center that our church has been meeting in. Since I'm all about getting out and meeting new people, I agreed to try it out. The girl who trained me (showed me where the lights were) made sure I knew that the job was REALLY simple, and that I was basically just an extra body to tell people where the bathrooms are. She told me to bring my laptop and a book...so I did. I had some time to myself at the beginning of the night before anyone got there, but when people arrived, things started rolling!

I've never been to a Bar Mitzvah before, so I was really more interested in the party than I was in my internet (I know...you're shocked!) So I helped out where I could and talked to lots of really nice Mafia sorts of individuals, who treated me like family, and told me all about the big celebration!! BIG is and understatement. This was like Super Sweet Sixteen CRAZY!!

I knew it would be a great night when the caterer set up the sushi bar right on top of the desk I was working from!! Sushi was just an appetizer! The thing that was cool about the whole party was that it was sort of separated, so the kids partied on one end of the room and the adults on the other. Kids and adults each had different meals and desserts...which all were delicious!

As much as I knew this wasn't a party I was particularly invited to, I couldn't help but to join in on my "Crank That" song.

I watched the family do the Hora which was really cool!! After that, the kids all went home and the adults just drank themselves crazy! I got offered a ton of liquor to take home, but since it was my first night, and since I'm not a big drinker, I declined! But then, on their way out my new friends gave me a case of beer and a bottle of wine. So...it will probably just sit in the fridge until my parents come next week!

It ended up being A LOT of work, and my feet hurt like crazy. I didn't realize until I got home that I was there for 9 hours. It's 2AM now and we have to be back to church by 9:00AM in the morning. But the experience of my first Bar Mitzvah was well worth it! I hope I can do another one again soon!

Back By Popular Demand!

2008-05-08T11:55:00.000-04:00

The popular demand of my family in San Diego, that is.

Another Cameron and Riley Video:

Another reality check from the 3 year old!

2008-05-03T08:56:00.000-04:00

Last night, after Cameron's bedtime story, I was holding him and rubbing his back (per his request!) While I was holding him, I told him that I was going to be sad when he grows bigger. He asked me why I'd be sad. I told him it was because one day he'd be to big for me to hold him like a baby. And that I wished I could hold him like a baby forever!

His response? One I'd never predict to come out of his mouth!

After a few second pause, Cameron responded to my concern by saying:

"That's called change, mom. Sometimes change doesn't always make you happy...but change is a good thing, mom!"

WOAH!! I just about jumped up when he said that. I was sooo bummed I didn't catch the moment on video! He was so right on... it was almost just weird! In attempts to draw more out of that statement, I started asking questions like what does change mean, Cameron? Then he started talking about baby chicks hatching from eggs and other completely irrelevant things. That's when I reminded myself that he's still only three years old! We then went back to counting big fluffy sheep jumping over white fences!

I hope, someday, I'll be able to grasp change like Cameron explained it to me last night.

Go Bobcats!

2008-05-01T11:40:00.000-04:00

A few months ago, Lee and Steve decided to coach a 12 and under girls softball team here in Raleigh. When Steve first committed to coaching with Lee, I wasn't looking forward to him being gone more nights out of the week for practices and games. Especially since I'm already gone 2 nights out of the week...but meeting new people is a big part of our life here, so we thought it would be a good idea.

Turns out...it wasn't a good idea. It was a GREAT idea!! I forgot what it was like being a 12 year old girl. Now I get to practically relive those days every week!

I really can't describe why I have such a good time watching the team play. You REALLY have to be there to just experience it...but I'm not kidding you, Bobcat games are a definite HIGHLIGHT of every week.

Each girl brings a different and very distinct personality to the team. Some are more competitive than others. Some are REALLY developing great technique, while others are still learning rules of the game!

I love watching Steve and Lee coach, because they both have different styles in coaching each girl. Lee is the most encouraging guy on the face of the planet when it comes to his softball team. "Great Job" is the only thing that comes out of that guy's mouth...whether they hit home runs, or strike out 3 times in a row. Steve, on the other hand, isn't so delightful all of the time. If you were on his co-ed team last year, then you know that my husband can get a little intense. Although he doesn't march out on the field and yell at the 12 year olds, I have seen him roll his eyes and hit the fence when one of them makes an error!

One thing that these girls all have in common is the fact that they just love being together more than anything!!! After about 5 innings of making up cheers and figuring out who can scream the loudest, one of them usually comes up and asks what the score is. That girl will then report to the rest of the girls and then they'll ALL CHEER REALLY LOUD either because they're winning or because "ALL WE NEED IS 4 HOME RUNS TO WIN, WOO HOO!!" (Followed by a girly shriek, and then a loud deep growling YEEAAHHHH!!)

The new COOL thing the girls do is, when anyone makes a good defensive play, instead of giving ONE teammate a high five, ALL of the girls (outfield and infield) run, SCREAMING, to the girl who made the play to give her hugs and secret handshakes. Thankfully there's no delay of game rule!

Carlee is definitely my favorite Bobcat! We just have this amazing inner connection! Like sometimes she'll be pitching on the pitchers mound. And in between pitches, while the batter is in stance waiting for the ball, Carlee will look over at me wink her eye and rub her tummy. This is her telekinetic way of telling me she CAN'T WAIT to go to Sweet Tomatoes (Soup Plantation) after the game!

When the girls are focussed, and Lee is repeatedly telling them to throw the ball into the glove, they're a pretty good team. Actually, they're a REALLY good team. I am SO proud to be part of our 12 and under Bobcats!!

Free Cone Day at Ben and Jerrys!

2008-04-29T15:54:00.000-04:00

Don't miss out!!

Unabashed Confession.

2008-04-28T21:56:00.000-04:00

I LOVE the Backstreet Boys.

As I was sorting through some old CD's the other day, I found my "Mellenium" album. I forgot about the way I MELT when I listen to almost every song on the CD. A lot of my BB sentiment stems from great memories of not too long ago.

My favorite memory of the Backstreet Boys is from when I was in high school, playing ball for our club team. My dad (the cool guy that he is) bought most BB cd's whenever they came out. We'd travel far away to tournaments almost every weekend. I'd get in the car in full uniform minus cleats (waited to put those on when we were 1 exit away from the fields). My dad and I would cruise the freeway in his Lexus with the windows down...bumping "I'll be the One" on his AWESOME system! We'd sing every word at the top of our lungs (at least I did!). Sometimes I'd even stand on the middle console and stick my head out the sunroof to really give the song it's full effect. Good times.

Another fond memory with the Boys was, again in high school...when nothing mattered besides persuading my favorite teachers into letting me ditch class. I really wanted to hook 2 of my teachers up. Mr. McMahon and Ms. Kable. They were great friends, I thought they needed to be MORE than friends. So...me and my bff, Jenna would talk to each of them separately and arrange to all meet for lunch in one of their classrooms (on MANY occasions). When they sat down to eat lunch, me and Jenna would totally play cool, pretend that we were all there just enjoying eachother's company...then (tricky me) I'd casually make my way to the CD player in the room by Ms. Kables desk, and switch whatever CD she had in there with my Backstreet Boys Mellenium CD. "I Need You Tonight" was THE PERFECT song for the greatly anticipated moment they were about to have...so I'd BLARE it...I'd give Jenna the signal and we'd make an excuse to leave so that they could both just have time to sit and soak in the words and understand that they were just made for each other.

The end result? Well...they both got married to different people...but oh well! It left me with one of my favorite memories EVER!

As a tribute to what I'd call my FAVORITE season of life, here's a list of my all time favorite songs by the Backstreet Boys! Timeless in my heart FOR SURE!

1. I'll Be The One
2. I Need You Tonight
3. As Long As You Love Me
4. Don't Want You Back
5. I Want it That Way
6. I'll Never Break Your Heart
7. Quit Playing Games
8. Larger Than Life
9. Everybody (Backstreet's Back)
10. All I Have to Give

Thanks Backstreet Boys for the memories!

CATT UPDATE 4.26.08

2008-04-26T15:31:00.000-04:00

For the past few weeks, since my last update, we've been trying to land an office space. We really want to have a 7 day a week presence in a building where we'd be able to hold classes in, store supplies etc... Every space in the mall where we're we meet on Sunday's was occupied...until about 2 weeks ago!

We heard about a possible opening in the indoor mall, and after a little research and talking with the landlord, God blessed us with an office!! We couldn't have asked for a better location, as it's directly across from the room where we've been meeting for service on Sunday mornings! We're actually going to have our service in the spot this weekend, because the event center room is being used for a wedding this Sunday morning!

I can't tell you how nice it is to be able to walk into a building and LEAVE our stuff there!! We've been setting up and tearing down EVERY WEEKEND... time well spent, yes. But I am so thankful we won't have to pack up the car on Saturday nights anymore to prepare for Sunday mornings!!

Here's sort of a diagram of where our office space is in relation to our meeting space.

And here is a front view of our new office space, which we'll use as our meeting space pretty regularly.

Aside from buildings and church, church, church...we're settling in well to our new community. We actually just noticed that last week we had commitments EVERY night of the week!! It didn't take too long for our weeknights to fill up!!

Before I got here, I asked God to place me in great friendships. The funny thing about that is when I finally got here, I didn't have much desire for meeting a ton of people right away. Not sure why! Most anyone who knows me, knows that I love and even LIVE in deep relationships! Well I was able to enjoy living in anonymity for a few months...and now I have a fresh new desire for friends and knowing them! YAY! I would mention them, but they already know who they are!!

Steve's niece, Krystle finally got here about 2 weeks ago! She has already been a HUGE help! She's been interviewing for jobs at the mall by our house. I'm anxious for her to find her own group of friends here soon!

We have an exciting new series coming up, which will definitely turn up temperature of our project here. So when we finish defining what that will look like, I'll be sure to post an update!!

Thanks again to all who are praying daily for Church at the Triangle!! You rock!

After our Easter Experience, one of our guys put together a video highlighting the events of the day. Click here to check it out! It might take a few seconds to load.

Bright Smiles and Blue Skies

2008-04-24T13:35:00.000-04:00

Another beautiful day to be in Raleigh, North Carolina!

Idol...

2008-04-23T22:01:00.000-04:00

Wow! Wow! Wow! Holy COW!

27 MORE DAYS...

2008-04-17T16:18:00.000-04:00

...until Grandma and Grandpa get here!!

The boy can't WAIT to see you!!!